Geek Speaks

Pod this.

2006-03-08T20:03:00.000-08:00

Maybe apple should concentrate a little more on what's in the box instead of on how the box looks.

Here I am restoring my iPod back to factory settings for the fourth time. Not really the fourth time-- well, I mean on this pod. You see this is the pod they gave me 6 months ago when the first one burned up its hard drive after 6 months.

Now I got the dreaded folder icon again and I can hear the disk thrashing in there. It's dying again and I'm going to have to go into the store and talk to one of those losers, er I mean "geniuses".

You know what, "Genius"? You work in retail, grow the f*** up.

Remember how Michael Jackson proclaimed himself the "King of Pop" and everybody just started calling him that? Well, Apple has done the same with its products. Instead of calling themselves by an overly extravagant handle, they've told all of us how cutting-edge and sleek they are. No they're not, they suck and I'm sick of dealing with them.

Hey, wanna attach a printer to a MAC? Don't try it on your own because the ultra-intuitive MAC interface is way to cool for you square. You'll never figure out what to do. Oh, and don't read the manual either, because it doesn't exist.

My favorite Apple product is that airport. Someone in my family has one. The laptop PC in the house connects to it fine, but the stupid MAC couldn't find it.

I tell you, I've about had my fill. Last year Apple stock went through the roof. When asked about the prognosis of it continuing to accel this year, one analyst was heard to say:

I don't think so. Everyone in my house already has an iPod.

I suppose the stores will stay open another year or so, enough time for the warranties to run out and for all those iPods out there to get replaced when their battery fries or their hard drive crashes or who knows what else.

Now What?

2006-02-27T07:16:00.000-08:00

We were talking about vice this weekend and what damage it does. We weren't speaking about vice in general, but about specific vice (or the glorification thereof in the arts).

I call myself a bit of a liberty-freak. So when it comes to what we consume and what we allow to be consumed as a public I tend to ere on the side complacent. You do what you want, I'll do what I want and I won't really get involved in your business unless it overlaps mine. This theory works fine when dealing with things like self-destructive behavior. Do I really care if some moron bungie jumps off a bridge or rides a motorcycle a 100 mph without a helmet? More precisely, in either of those cases does it really have an impact on my life (insurance adjustments not withstanding)?

What do you do though when you start looking at morality and good taste in the arts? Further, what about subversive messages and what-not in items that pass the censors?

If I rent or own billboard space should I be allowed to put any content on it I wish? Society has dictated, mandated in fact that public displays of this nature must be restricted in their content. I can't put a picture of a naked person or profane text on the billboard. City ordinances normally police this sort of thing. Some cities may be more restrictive than others. For instance, when I was in Vegas last year, there are many outside-displays that feature women wearing very close to nothing. What's displayed in Vegas though, stays in Vegas.

We were discussing the arts specifically this weekend; movies and music. Being a liberty-freak, I've always believed that censorship should begin and end with the volume knob. I will admit that music and movies (including TV) has degenerated into what most would consider filth. Year after year the record industry and Hollywood have "pushed the envelope" as they would call it. Envelope pushing being a clever euphemism for seeing what they could get away with. Nudity and higher degrees of profanity are all over our airwaves, not to mention extreme increases in vulgarity, violence and uncomfortable subject matter.

subversively, there is also a movement to push society to accept lifestyles that most don't. Homosexuality while tolerated by most is not accepted by most. There's a definitive difference in allowing something to occur vs banning it as a danger. Hollywood continues to push the idea of mainstream-gay acceptance. This year's Oscar darling in "Broke Back Mountain" is the latest attempt. Yet, though it is acclaimed by the critics and enjoying a never-ending publicity stream, nobody is going to see it.

Again this year the academy awards will be going to movies that most people weren't interested in. Block buster movies, those that sell the most tickets, don't seem to win a lot of awards. Granted, the value of something artistically probably can't be measured solely by the dollars it generates. However, art that is largely ignored by the public serves no one but the artist. I don't really think that is art that deserves awards. It can be art if it is only for yourself. You can paint a picture to hang on your wall and enjoy and have it be a wondrous example of art. However, if most anyone else in the world looks at your painting and considers it to be crap, then it really shouldn't receive an award.

Hollywood and the record industry both seem less and less interested in providing marketable products to you and me. This seems odd considering that these people make their money off you and me. Although, they aren't making what they used to make. This year's Grammy ratings were the lowest since 1995. This year's awards were watched by 28% fewer people than in 2004. It's not just a hatred for awards shows, it's a growing distaste in the music being delivered to consumers. The record industry doesn't seem to care as the music does not appear to be getting any better.

So, if the way to control product is to buy what's good and not buy what's bad, how can you affect supply and demand if the supplier doesn't care what you buy? Sooner or later the supplier goes out of business, but then you still are left without a product-- A lose-lose for you and the supplier both. The volume knob can't become your censoring medium now, because there's a lessening need to even need a knob. Just unplug the whole radio.

As of right now, the number one song on Billboard's Hot 100 is "Check On It" from Beyonce and featuring something called Slim Thug. Here's a snip:

If you got it flaunt it, boy I know you want it
While I turn around you watch me check up on it
Oohhh you watchin me shake it, I see it in ya face
Ya can't take it, it's blazin, you watch me in amazement
You can look at it, as long as you don't grab it
If you don't go braggin, I might let you have it
You think that I'm teasin, but I ain't got no reason
I'm sure that I can please ya, but first I gotta read you

The entire nonsense is here.

Now, if you read the lyrics you and I can both agree that there's no profanity. There's barely in any English in fact. However, we can probably also agree that the subject matter is not what I want my daughter singing. That said, my daughter is exactly who this music is targeted toward. Kids buy pop albums, not college kids. College kids buy whiney ac acoustic guitar albums about lost ideals. Young kids buy the thump-thump house music.

The Black Eyed Peas are featured in a number of commercials. XM satellite, Best Buy to name a few. Here's some lyrics from their song "My Hump" which Verizon Wireless has now adopted in one of their commercials:

What you gon' do with all that junk?
All that junk inside your trunk?
I'ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely little lumps. (Check it out)

I drive these brothers crazy,
I do it on the daily,
They treat me really nicely,
They buy me all these ices.
Dolce & Gabbana,
Fendi and NaDonna
Karan, they be sharin'
All their money got me wearin' fly
But I ain't askin,
They say they love my ass Ân,
Seven Jeans, True Religion's,
I say no, but they keep givin'
So I keep on takin'
And no I ain't taken
We can keep on datin'
I keep on demonstrating.

OK, if you're buying this crap, stop it. Sooner or later the idea of censorship comes down to a discussion of value. Is there any inherent value in junk? Is there any societal necessity that this crap continue to be pushed on us. I didn't buy this album. I do not watch MTV or listen to the radio stations where "My Hump" is played. However, because I watched TV on Sunday afternoon I now know this song exists. By the way, the stanza in the Verizon commercial I'm pretty sure (I'm not real versed in picking words out of this vernacular) includes the "I'm gonna get you drunk" line. Nice, thanks. Please play it on Nickelodian right when school gets out.

I do not want this stuff censored. I will not back down on that. I still believe that I can better educate my kids by explaining this crap to them and showing them it's crap then I could by simply stamping it with a Mr Yuck sticker and hiding it in a closet. However, it cannot be denied that the crap Hollywood and the record industry is giving us both in terms of taste and quality serves no real purpose other than as a cheap way of getting publicity.

I've made the argument often that Brittany Spears of Ashley Simpson lip syncing is no big deal. Why? Because their music is just another accessory to the package. It is no more or less important than their perfume line or their posters. Who cares if they sing or play an instrument, their product is not about music anyway. The Black Eyed Peas of the world are exactly the same as Brittany, so don't dilute yourself into thinking they're artists. They're about finding a cheap way to make money. You can get a laugh in second grade yelling "poopie" and you can sell albums to teen agers by being overtly distasteful. Like I said, sales are down, but some do sell and the only thing they seem to be offering to sell is this stuff.

So what do we do when our dollars and deaf ears make no difference? What do we do when advertisers like Best Buy and Verizon are complicit?

I wish I knew.

Music to my fears

2006-02-21T12:44:00.000-08:00

If video truly killed the radio star as we were told nearly 30 years ago, the mp3 player is killing the record industry. Why? Because people no longer are forced to listen to whatever is on the radio or just a few songs on a CD. Now, your entire music history can fit in the palm of your hand. Why listen to on the radio content that probably is 80% what you DON'T want to hear? Forget the commercials, most music today is rotten.

I'm not a crotchedy old man that hates everything that doesn't come wrapped in a Creedence Clearwater Revival album sleeve. I don't think that good music ended with the end of vinyl. I love music and following the industry. I've said that before and I still don't know why. Alas, it interests me so I stay with it. Today though, I can tell you that it is the worst bit of popular talent I've ever seen.

Even in the disco era there was Billy Joel and Zeppelin and Pink Floyd. In the 80's when Madonna and Michael Jackson were pushing out crappy album after crappy albumn, there still was good music from Dire Straits and Men at Work and Aerosmith and the like.

Country music has been strong for a long time, but even it now has filled with weepy junk. Crying cowboys crying about everything. Crying about their kids, their wives. That's nothing new, but in this case they're tears of joy! In classical country you cry "cuz you walked out on yer youngins or because she dun started cheatin" Now, these guys like Tim McGraw are so sensitive they sound like Dan Fogelburg.

Pop music is awful. Who's big? Brittany has self-destructed and Jessica Simpson? Are you kidding me? That Dominos commercial is enough to make you pull an Elvis and shoot the television. No short skirt can make up for that opening line of "OK bites, start poppin". Painful. The non-bubble-gum stars are bad too and depressing. If country has started recording songs where the performers are all crying, the other bands in other genres are recording songs that put the public in a state of depression. Imagine if American Bandstand were still on. How do you dance to some screaming rant about how your life is over and you can't just go on?

If you turn on VH1 today, it's the most depressing bit of twaddle I've ever seen. Sepia or gray-toned images of angst. Based on what? I'm a young hipster dripping with babes and B.S.? What exactly are you depressed about?

The Grammy's had lousy ratings and the record industry expected. Album sales are down and don't confuse all those music downloads for a active music industry. One of my friends has taken to downloading Russian music because aside from the language its more entertaining. Who won the most Grammys? Maria-flipping-Carey. This is the best they have? sheesh.

And then there's rap or hip-hop or urban or whatever it is. I went to a local bar 2 weeks ago where there was a DJ. I've never argued for censorship on the basis of "needless crude content", but I have to tell you that I'm not sure what value this crap had. F-this, F-that, I want to F-this because your trunk has f-this and f-that. Oh F F F, come on babe and F-your trunk with your big F T F F XYZ. I'm not sure what to make of it, there is no value. It's not easy to dance to. It appears to just be a new Alice Cooper. We're not scaring our parents with this music anymore, we're listing to music that seems to suggest that all people, teens alike should hurry up and become parents. I mean sooner or later all that F-ing ends you up F-ing pregneant. Or dead. Or in jail.

That's the other thing about rap. Talk about a glorification poor lifestyle choices. Besides wondering what's in someone's trunk, there's a lot of F-ing going to F-ing shoot you in the F-ing insert-body-part-here. Again, I don't see how this is something that you want to be-bop to while driving to work.

When I was a kid we were all worried about back-masking. I don't buy into the theory that listening to Stairway to Heaven will turn me into a satan worshiper. However, you don't need to play this rap junk backwards to get the bad messages. All the rap messages are right there in the open. I'm amused by the movement to ban "Another one bites the dust" because some imagined they could hear "I like to smoke marijuana" over and over again when you play the track backwards. With all the "chronic" references in this rap-junk, you'd think it would be easy to find it obscene.

Anyway, beyond the highly dubious nature of some of the music, the bulk of all populer music is becoming trash. There's very little mainstream music (and let's face it, that where we all get our music no matter how underground we pretend to be) that worth much of anything. That's probably why my iPod disk drive never cools down and why my stereo receiver is rarely ever switched to "tuner" anymore.

Spring already?

2006-02-20T16:12:00.000-08:00

Yawn, scratch, cough..cough. Spit and snort. Ah, hibernation, what a nice break.

Now that I’m awake, how’s about a recap?

Let’s see….Vikings sex scandal:

I think the whole thing was a big misunderstanding. They were strategizing on that boat. Culpepper was not receiving a lap dance. Instead he was demonstrating the way he felt he saw the press treating him. And you know, I think he’s right. You know, if they ever do a porno-version movie of this whole escapade (and of course they will), it will be difficult even for their talent pool to find someone who is as bad an actor as our man Dante.

The winter Olympics:

Why do these people look like they were randomly selected for competition from among the people waiting in line for the Xbox 360 2 months ago? Let’s talk Bode for a minute. I’ve heard of people who are a legend in their own mind, but here’s a guy who’s excelled only in his ability to artfully fail. His crashes have been amazing in that he’s been able to gracefully f-up better than anyone I’ve ever seen. In fact, these Olympics are poorly scored. For given the bell curve, we shouldn’t be looking at quality using success as a measure. Instead it should be the content of the failure that these be judged; given that, Bode rocks. Bode fails with all the ego we used to attribute to winners. I’m used to seeing the difference between first and tenth being measured in thousandth of a second. In this Olympics, first and tenth are separated by the gold medal being given to the fellow who could find the podium. Tenth place? Hell, he might still be up in the trees somewhere.

Cheney shot a guy:

Here’s what bugs me. Ted Kennedy was part of the world’s most odd swimming accident. Senator Byrd was in the KKK. Hillary Clinton…well, Hillary has caused the death of more erections than cheap wine. And we’re worried about Dick Cheney shooting some guy while hunting in the South? These stereotypes are born from truth. Famous last words of a southerner: “Hey y’all watch this”. End of story.

Wire tapping:

The Whitehouse is, gasp, listening in on suspected terrorists by tapping their phones without warrants. Who the hell cares? Tap my phone George, please. If you do, you’ll sponsor legislation to end all solicitation by mortgage brokers, siding salesman, feature films for family’s, time shares and carpet cleaners.

Is it any wonder I’ve been in hibernation? I can’t keep up with this nonsense.

Tomorrow I will write again as I haven’t enough time to give the next topic its do. The music industry, my bizarre hobby and how we are in the biggest trough of talent I’ve seen in my time on Earth.

Sick, again

2005-10-20T10:02:00.000-07:00

When you go to the doctor after hours and haven't had something severed, punctured or accidentally ingested you are brought to a crossroads. Urgent Care or the Emergency Room.

The Emergency Room is where all the high-end overnight staff works. You look at them the same way you look at ghetto firefighters. They do a job that is done by others in less stressful and complex conditions and they are not only competent in these scenes, but they seem to feed off the adrenalin. The Emergency Room has stigma and gravitas. It is called the "ER". Urgent Care is not called the "UC". Only the ER has achieved NASA status. The equipment in the ER is worthy of NASA status as well. Everything is new and even though you can imagine that the room you're sitting in was last occupied by a violently vomiting meth-head fresh from crashing his [mom's/girlfriend's] 1987 Baretta into school bus, there's no evidence of the vomit, meth or anything else that could've been on that bus.

Urgent Care is where they send the people that don't qualify for the emergency room or in other words where they send them because back home is not an option on the form. Most people who go to urgent care don't need to be there with the exception of people who just need a prescription. As a father, Urgent Care was sometimes the only option to get antibiotics to fight an ear infection and ear infections ONLY appear 15 minutes after the clinic closes and they turn your child into an insane person. Urgent Care is staffed with people who's sole purpose is to act as entertainment for the ER staff. When the ER staff goes out to have a smoke they can watch all the Urgent Care doctors feverishly try to help another doctor dislodge his tie from the automatic doors. These are the stock boys of hospital hierarchy. Their only real skill is writing prescriptions which is perfect because the only reason you go to Urgent Care is to get one. In fact, if you have a high fever or abdominal pain you can't go to Urgent Care. So, for me, the only reason I go to the doctor is if I have a high fever or abdominal pain and therefore I would never go to Urgent Care in theory. I say in theory because this was a learned practice. I've gone to Urgent Care often with my children, but once I went for myself. The "doctor" decided that he wanted me to be given an Influenza test. The test they attempted to perform on me was one in which a fluid-filled plastic crayon is inserted 4 inches up your nose. The fluid is shot into your head momentarily, but then takes its final resting place on your shirt. The exit of the fluid then creates a vacuum to extract a mass of cranial tissue. The tissue is then picked through to remove all the brain matter leaving only snot. If they wanted snot, I have much easier ways of getting it out. In my case, rather than using nurses or even someone who stayed at a Holiday Inn Express, they decided to use random homeless people to apply the test. They went through 12 of the little plastic tubes before gathering what they considered to be "enough snot". I went to Urgent Care with a low-grade week-long fever. I left with a low-grade fever AND a bloody nose.

Last night I had a 103 degree fever and had been fighting it for about 3 days. We'd cleaned the basement on Sunday and that night I came down with a fever and cough and various other cold like symptoms. At first I thought it may have been from accidentally reading one of my wife's old college text books, but they normally only gave me a rash. I did not work on Monday or Tuesday. On Tuesday night I thought I felt better, so I consigned myself to working Wednesday. On Wednesday I made it most of the day, but by day's end I found myself leaning on walls and closing one eye to read. This is fine if you're a Senator, but not for me.

So at 7pm last night I decided to drive to the doctor. With my fever, the ER would be my destination. One new question has been added to the mix of airport-security questions asked of you when submitting to care at the hospital:

Have you ever been abused by someone important to you?

The basis of that question isn't new. When my second child was born, the sign on the back of the bathroom door in the hospital room read "Has your spouse threatened to have you deported?". What was new in this case was the clause "...by someone important to you". I didn't answer. Well, I did it but it was "What does that mean? If I get abused by somebody unimportant they get a pass? And are you asking in terms of what sense? I mean, usually if a person is getting abused by somebody they reclassify them from important to unimportant fairly quickly". The nurse took the I-just-have-to-ask-stance and moved on.

Name that illness:

An acute or chronic disease marked by inflammation of the lungs and caused
by viruses, bacteria, or other microorganisms and sometimes by physical and
chemical irritants.

If you guessed pneumonia you're RIGHT! and that's what I've got. So here I sit for two more days eating pills like they were free bar peanuts and watching bad TV. Really bad TV. Aside from Magnum PI, the entire TV day is crap. I remember when it was still crap, but it was stuff like Sally or Oprah or Rikki or whatever. Now every channel is nonstop SEX. After seeing it mentioned on the E Network show "The Soup" I decided to click into Mtv's "NEXT" show. This is on at 3:30 in the afternoon; right as the kids step off the bus. It should be on at 2 AM. Here is a video preview under "Next Moments".There wasn't a lot of swearing and "technically" no nudity although the girls on the show I watched might as well have been nude. However, mature content abounded. MTV though, probably considers 12 year olds to be mature enough to understand that dating at their age means going to PG movies on Saturday afternoon or to a well-lit junior high dance. Surely they know that the over-sexed antics by these absolutely classless people MTV is showing is not the norm right? Surely the same parents that let them watch this crap have told them this distinction right? Well, that's for another day.

I'm sure I need to take another pill by now. It's been 20 minutes.

YES!

2005-10-11T06:47:00.000-07:00

Hail Gonzo

I'm going to see PJ!

See you there?

Judge-mental.

2005-10-04T08:53:00.000-07:00

Watched some of the race-replay. I'm back to my original conclusion: Johnson dumped Sadler going into the corner and then whined about it...watch the tape, you'll agree.

Phew, got that off my chest. Now on to less important things.

Harriet Miers. There's a lot of worry about this one. She's an unknown and nobody likes an unknown. You know what makes this matter though? That personal opinion actually comes into play in the Supreme Court. Sure, that's their job. However, their opinions are supposed to be predictable and framed on a judgment of the cases at hand. That's the big distinction: In my lifetime I've seen the Supreme Court shift its focus from judging cases to judging law.

If Harriet Miers or John Roberts for that matter will be erratic or liberal in their decisions, then they won't really be doing what I always understood the court is to do. Congress makes laws, the courts adjudicate cases based on those laws. The Supreme Court always had the ability to declare a law unconstitutional as a check and balance. However, judging constitutionality should done at the same frequency as we judge whether or not our rules about bed time are wrong when our children complain about missing the last 10 minutes of Sponge Bob.

Again, we're worrying about the wrong problem. We're allowing the courts to be co-opted and then playing the game by trying to influence the bench with "our people". Through legislation, we must restrict the power of the court to operate outside its constraints. There are no checks to stop judges from operating outside the will of the people-- and that is frightening.

This should be a lesson for all those "middle-leaning" politicos out there. If you hate being on the right or the left and want to live in the gray area, you should remember that thinking leads to this sort of judicial eraticism. An unprincipled populous will beget a random judicial at best and an unscrupulous one at worst.

This is also a lesson on right vs left. Here again is a distinction. The right is scared of Harriet Miers because she's an unknown and might make judgments not based on the law, but on her own opinion. The left is scared or Roberts and Miers because they were nominated by Bush and might not vote to keep abortion legal if asked.

Which group scares you more? The left would seem to sell the entirety of the legal system down the river just to ensure that abortion-on-demand is never interrupted.

So Becky, when the government uses eminent domain to take your house, don't feel bad. They've also made sure that you won't be needing that nursery anyway.

The eye of the storm never leaves Washington

2005-09-21T15:32:00.000-07:00

I'm not against the idea of providential influence, I just don't think it should be seen so clearly in every event. However, you gotta wonder when considering the apparent pervasive Godlessness of the people left in New Orleans...is that why a new hurricane is steaming toward the town to which they were all evacuated?

This Rita storm is huge. "HOW HUGE IS IT!" screams the studio audience. It's so huge that the satellite view I just looked at shows it larger than Texas. Not a funny response, but the punch-line here might just be a bigger disaster than what hit Louisiana. In Texas, it might break something valuable.

Speaking of storms: Reid Announces Opposition to Roberts.

I thought the press only reported man-bites-dog stories?

"For me, Mr. President, this is a very close question. But I must resolve my doubts in favor of the American people, whose rights would be in jeopardy if John Roberts turns out to be the wrong person for this job," he [Senate Democratic Leader Harry Reid ] said.

So I guess Mr Reid will be voting against any nominee then based on this reasoning. "...whose rights would be in jeopardy IF John Roberts turns out to be the wrong person for this job". So are we indicting the entire office here? He's suggesting that he can't vote because if Roberts was a bad person he could do harm. He's not saying that Roberts is bad, he saying that jeepers creepers what if he is? I agree. Jeepers Creepers, let's not ever have policemen because what if they were bad. Jeepers Creepers let's not ever vote for a senator because what if they were bad.

Good question though. What if they were bad. Ask it as it pertains to politics and political theory. Bill Mahr, theoretical satirist, once stated that each side of the political landscape, Democrat and Republican alike, takes and is influenced by special interest money. He went on to say that given this, the Democrats special interests seem to be a lot less scary than the Republican special interests and therefore Democrats are safer. That's not really the issue though, the issue isn't about what organizations or people who buy favor in Washington will do, the issue is what will the purchased politicians do; and to further that thought, what if they were bad?

If a Republican was bad, a liberal might conclude that they would allow corporate America to run amok pillaging and destroying the environment and 401ks. OK, that's what they'd say. In contrast, Democrats, when they're bad might do what? Well, they might do exactly what they'd do if they were good. Take from one, give to another, skim off the top. Those who advocate government control and constraints do exactly that. Redistribute wealth to those whom they see fit as worthy and then keep a little bit for the effort.

So as Mr Reid, a Democrat, is concerned about Roberts going bad, what is he worried about exactly? He's not concerned about writing law from the bench or striking down legislative action based on spurious claims. No, because that's what the liberals like in a judge. I also don't think Reid is talking about abortion here either. Roberts being bad is more about a state of understanding in the eyes of the public and the media. Reid is essentially saying that I can't vote for this guy because what if all my friends come to the conclusion that they don't like him. I need to be able to say "well, I was afraid of that".

But ol' Harry continued:

"It is now clear that as a young lawyer, John Roberts played a significant role in shaping and advancing the Republican agenda to roll back civil rights protections," he said.

Huh? This isn't clarified in the story by the way. It isn't clear if the reporter issued a follow-up question of "Are you f*cking out of your mind?". I'm fairly certain that "roll back civil rights protections" has never been a plank in the Republican platform. So since the majority party and therefore the majority representation of the US population hasn't been proved by statement or deed to be "rolling back civil rights", why are we accused of it and why is that accusation allowed to stand. Reid is saying that because he's Republican he's not to be trusted. That's partisan my friend.

What of this "going bad" and "Republican agenda" stuff? I don't even think the statements are related. Senator Byrd, a democrat was in the KKK for cripes sake. And the Republicans have racial issues? Please. Reid is going for quotes here, the sad thing is that the media is so desperate to print something and make a controversy where one is absent that they won't even bother to argue with this flap-trap.

Wal-Mart debate gains momentum across Minnesota

2005-09-12T08:12:00.000-07:00

Wal-Mart debate gains momentum across Minnesota: "Deb Rousu doesn't consider herself a rabble-rouser. But when asked recently to sign a petition pledging not to shop at Wal-Mart, she grabbed the pen without hesitation."

Oh yeah, I'm sure she was moved in an instant to sign that petition. I'm sure that up until now she had just breezed through life not noticing her surroundings. That day, at the fair, she put down her cheese curds and decided to fight back. Against what, I am not sure.

"Why should the American public be helping a huge corporation pay for employee health care?" asked Rousu, a nurse from Plymouth who had heard that a lot of Wal-Mart workers use state-subsidized health insurance.

Well, duh. How's that for literary excellence? So we're now mad at a corporation for employing the poor? This woman's quote is like powdered milk, it would be close to lucid if you added something to transform it from the dusty uselessness that it represents. What great purpose, what point does this quote make that it should be included? Let's twist this another way. You can choose to not shop at Wal-Mart; it's your right and discretion. However, I can't choose not to pay my taxes. Yet, more so than Wal-Mart, the government is responsible for carrying millions on welfare and Medicare programs not to mention all the government employees. I can't walk away from that obligation. Yet, through some twisted logic, I guess we are supposed to be mad at Wal-Mart for not lessening a problem that government created.

""Wal-Mart represents everything that we fear -- or want -- at the same time," said Hy Berman, a retired University of Minnesota history professor.

"What we want is cheap stuff, sold to us efficiently. But many people fear the encroachment of big business, the destruction of Ma and Pa businesses.""

Oh, but again the government has done nothing to hurt ma and pa businesses right? How about all those ma and pa businesses that liquidate the day ma and pa die because the children can't pay the inheritance tax? How about all those small town governments that love to run to the newspapers and TV to decry "urban sprawl", but yet can't wait to place restrictions on family farms near the city limits with "excessive smells". Those same small-town governments love the idea of the tax revenue a Wal-Mart brings to town, yet they still want to act altruistic in front of the right people.

The Wal-Mart debate is growing as fast as the firm itself -- and it goes far beyond the usual T-shirts, mugs and bumper stickers. Books, conferences, TV documentaries, a Pulitzer Prize-winning newspaper series and countless media reports have examined the sweeping effects of the world's largest retailer, both good and bad. A new video documentary is slated for release this fall, and already organizers are setting up Twin Cities showings.

Oh, ok. So this anti-Wal-Mart movement has gravitas because it's not just CafePress trinkets, but instead it includes high-falluting documentaries. Regardless of facts, where there is smoke there's fire.

Here was the only pro-Wal-Mart person at the State Fair or at least the only one the writer chose to include:

Reaction to the campaign was mixed. Larry Aebly, a retired business owner from Wisconsin, looked at the booth and asked with bewilderment: "You're going to stop Wal-Mart from what?"

After hearing the sales pitch, Aebly and his wife decided not to sign the pledge. The reason: They park their RV in Wal-Mart parking lots when they travel, known in their circle as "Camp Wal-Mart." And they like it.

"We think Wal-Mart does a good job for us," Aebly said. "We can't stop shopping there."

So the thoughtful response among the common folks was a couple of wandering RV jockey's who really only use Wal-Mart for their own consumeristic selfish needs?-- AND they're consuming far more than the socially acceptable annual quantity of fuel. Disgusting. I'll bet they voted for Goldwater once too.

2 paragraphs from the end of the news story we get this:

Meanwhile, Wal-Mart expects to generate about 100,000 new jobs this year, the company predicts on its website. The website also says the company employs 1.2 million Americans, pays workers an average of $9.68 an hour, "almost double the federal minimum wage," and supports communities through property taxes, sales taxes and community giving.

Twice the "living wage"? So this story should be called "Wal-Mart backlash, why?". All those documentaries and media reports that the journalist chose to reference as evidence to the anti-Wal-Mart crusade's legitimacy should now be suspect and therefore this story is suspect. This story is backwards. There is no foundation to the complaints as this paragraph above says as Wal-Mart is far exceeding the expectations of the public.

As with the hurricane Katrina, let's look at this situation and try to find the actual problem. Is the problem here that Wal-Mart employs primarily low-skilled workers who they say don't qualify for health insurance or is the problem that there are so many low-skilled, unemployed individuals in our urban and rural areas? These people that work at Wal-Mart and are using social services for health care might otherwise be on welfare were it not for their job. Remember, these positions are not accountants or mangers. These people are corralling carts and stocking shelves.

Wal-Mart is doing for rural areas what rural governments have failed to do for the last 3 decades-- bring jobs and energy to their cities. I'm from rural Minnesota and if the area I grew up in decays any more it will be nothing but a meth lab with streets. Wal-Mart will not save these cities. However, it might keep people there and bring consumers in. If the rural governments, instead of complaining, would use Wal-Mart as a launching pad to bring in more business and stability they would have a chance of re-vitalizing their communities.

Let me ask you, if you own "Ma and Pa's International Widget Factory" and you're looking for a town to bring your new division and 500 well-paying w/benefits jobs to, are you going to be enticed by a town with a big new retail store or one that has an old Ben Franklin with 3 busted windows? Which will make you think that this is a town on the rise? Or in other words, if Wal-Mart sees potential here then why wouldn't we?

And she keeps talking.

2005-09-07T07:30:00.000-07:00

Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton, D-N.Y., reiterated her calls for the Federal Emergency Management Agency to be made autonomous from the Department of Homeland Security and for an independent commission to investigate the federal response to the disaster, saying neither Congress nor the administration should do it.

"The people that I met in Houston — they want answers and they want to know what went wrong and they want to know what they are going to be able to count on in the future,'' she told NBC's "Today'' show, two days after visiting refugees at the Astrodome. "I don't think the government can investigate itself.'' - Associated Press

For once I actually agree with her. The government can't investigate itself or do much of anything else either. For all those people trapped in the current disaster in New Orleans and that were previously trapped in the disaster that was the war on poverty, it's time to find a new safety net ratherthan government. It's time to use your skills-- perhaps they could all become locksmiths..

To blame governement for this disaster (how responding within 2 days is delayed I am still not quite able to figure out, but whatever) is a bit like blaming the band when the football team loses. The government marches along with us in this world and does get in our way a lot. However, in the end how much they actually help us is a matter of opinion.

Floating on the City of New Orleans

2005-09-06T09:50:00.000-07:00

Back from Florida and boy are my arms tired.

Heard a radio show yesterday where the two hosts were assailing the Federal government for their lack of preparedness in handling the Louisiana flood. A caller who had previously lost a home in the Florida Keys noted that when the Hurricane hit there it took FEMA several days to get in and help and he was appalled that there had been no improvement. "Most Folks", the caller said, "in the keys only have mopeds. They just had no way to evacuate when the call came in-- they needed outside help.". So let me get this straight, you live on an island that is 2 miles by 4 miles, your house is on stilts, you don't own a car and you are in an area that is prone to being hit by Hurricanes. Now, you're mad because the government isn't prepared?

I keep hearing the cries that these poor people in New Orleans had no money to leave, that they had no choice. I guess it's possible they couldn't afford a bus ticket. However, if they couldn't afford that to save their lives, how could they afford to live even if the flood hadn't hit? These people were essentially refugees before the disaster. How long could they possibly have lived before starving to death where they were with or without the flood? I would like to see CNN interview a person in the Astrodome and ask them if their life is now better because of the hurricane. They have a bed, 3 meals a day, access to schools and medical attention.

I don't believe that the a large percentage of the individuals trapped really were trapped at all. I think what you had left in New Orleans was the burnt sludge at the bottom of the melting pot. White, black, Asian, whatever-- this is the "poor on purpose" crowd. If there is no work and no hope in New Orleans than there is no reason to be there. The crime, the looting, the odd gunfire aimed at rescue personnel should signal to the viewer that this is a group born of low expectations and even lesser actualized results.

The news has been trying to show this group as a tired and desperate mass of regular folk. They're trying to show us that even our wondrous USA can be turned into a 3rd world toilet over night. They wish to show us that we are no different than the Sudan other than that we have money. Take the money away and we are no more civilized. Of course this is a farce. If an honest approach was taken the news would be focusing on why in the USA this group of never-will-be's were made and how they were funded. The majority of New Orleans got out. The responsible ones left and took their families with them. The responsible ones are already looking for a new life and a new job. What was left in New Orleans was the chaff. Instead of lessening the appearance of the responsible ones as simply lucky, we should be looking at the human mess that was created in New Orleans that led to such a pile of human refuse. Hurricane or not, this group is lost, hungry, violent and not really all that interested and joining society.

Maybe this event will spur some of this indigent group to find their feet-- but I doubt it. Society is neither asking them why they didn't take responsibility nor why they had placed themselves in such a permanent state of poverty. Instead, we are blaming those that are helping them. We are angry that when this body of lost souls stomped their feet like children, that we did not as parents coddle them and usher them off to safety. Continuing as we are with poverty and our assessment of it, in 30 years there will no longer be enough stadiums for Football; for they will all be filled with cots and complaints.

Cut loose, from the noose.

2005-08-26T07:14:00.000-07:00

Ok, so where the hell have I been. Well, I've been reading stuff like this for instance. That kept me busier than this used to. And let's not even get into Publius Enigma (I'll let you Google it.)

I've been busier than...um...than-- this is embarrassing. Well, I've been busier than as this guy says:

It's been a while since I rapped at ya, but I've been busier than a Japanese beaver in a petrified forest.

Thank you, Mr. Moth, that helped.

I am still busier than . Work has been crushing. I've written more code in the last 2 months than I've written in my life. My fingers look like Liberace's after a night of chopsticks and sequined-jammied gymnastics. Finding time to write was impossible. Let's also recap my summer thus far.

Tooth goes bad
Root Canal
Crown
Gall Bladder goes bad
Gall Bladder removed
Tuesday of this week my hard drive goes toes up
Wednesday of this week, glass fixture on ceiling smashes to the ground at 4:30am as I'm in the shower.
Tomorrow I leave..flying Northwest... for Florida...where there is a hurricane.

Autumn, I think will be better. I hope. Dear God. Please.

Looking very seriously about expanding our family by 1. He'll be small, furry and not house-trained. No, he's not Osama, he's a yellow lab and I think we might pull the trigger on this one (purchase I mean, the other sense of that phrase will not come to fruition for 10 years after purchase).

OK, that's it for today I need to go back to work. I am off with the family to Florida to see some of their interests and mine. I'll be back in a week and will TRY to start writing daily again. I'll do my best.

Shut down

2005-07-11T05:47:00.000-07:00

Wow, the government is open today. Phew, that was a close one. Another few months and I'm sure I would've noticed it was closed.

30 days ago we received a statement in the mail from the state indicating that license tabs for one of our vehicles would soon be due. Last year, I purchased my tabs online. Online renewal saved time for me and I presume should've saved the state money as I've helped lighten the load at the courthouse. This year, weeks before the shutdown and 6 weeks before the tabs were due the statement came with the text "Online registration currently disabled due to maintenance". I'm in I.T. and I would love to hear what my boss would say if I said "you know, we've got to make some modifications on that application which is available and applicable to 99% of our users-- I'd like to take it down for a few months-- ok?". Please. Perhaps I should have about 17 children out of wedlock and then need new tabs. The state seems obsessed with that.

The new budget deal is another damned boon for the DFL. Stomp their feet, bitch and cry and we just keep shoveling them more money and power. More money for the MEA, more money for MinCare, more money for transit (well, not transit. Instead of a gas tax we get higher license fees. "Transit" would imply roads or public transportation. There's nothing that useful in this deal), more money for women without children with breast cancer (no, I'm not kidding).

I don't see that we are paying the 8,900 "non-essential" or "unnecessary" (to pick perhaps a better euphemism) state employees who were furloughed. Watch for that to come in the next session. They'll call it "vacation re-instatement" or some other silly thing. Trust me, they'll get paid. I've had jobs where I've had to volunteer to give back weeks of vacation-- not six friggin days. "Many employees had already exhausted their vacation and sick time" the news says. For goodness sake, it's July! We're talking about a shutdown that was SIX DAYS!!! Come on here. The last time I had to "volunteer" to return my vacation to a company, others who were out of vacation had to give a week without pay. Welcome to the real world state employees, but now that the state is open again, you can go on back to the dream world where your salary is entitled, your work is discretionary and applications can be shutdown for months.

Who wins? Who loses? From the Star Tribune's Editorial:

Property owners would get dinged for $139 million in fiscal 2007, but the full force of property tax increases wouldn't hit until the 2008-09 biennium, when property taxes would rise another $409 million. The money would help fund the largest increase in K-12 spending in more than a decade.

This, we are told later is really to help we property owners. You see local counties have been going property-tax crazy of late. So you see, if the state sucks away your money, the county will be less apt to-- isn't that great? Of course, that's the property tax money. What about the millions upon millions thrown down the education rat-hole locally for tax-levies under referendum? We've all seen our home's values rise exponentially of late, but none of the state's actions here will lighten the load. The state gave the counties an excuse and a taste for green blood, there's no way they'll back away from the table now.

Again, what did the right get out of this deal? Diddly squat that's what. What we got is that the DFL didn't get everything they wanted. We win in their concessions to reductions in their wishes. "Oh ok, we'll only screw the tax payers a little more instead of a lot more".

Once more...

2005-07-07T05:23:00.000-07:00

On the opening page of the Star Tribune today is a "breaking story" covering the travesty in London. Beneath that story, is a picture of a mother and daughter screaming and grimacing into the camera lens-- the daughter has a sticker on her forehead that reads "Governor, we have a problem". The Minnesota government has been closed now 3 days. The world's problems just reminded us that our petty politics are down on the list of problems with which to deal.

When 9/11/2001 happened I remember spending most of that Tuesday accompanied by a pit in my stomach-- the pit was filled in the evening by a rather generous helping of E&J Brandy. My emotions were varied: sympathy, confusion, distress. By the next morning, all those emotions had given way to one: anger. My anger has continued ever since. Today with the attacks in London there was no mix of emotion. Anger has taken over. There really isn't an issue with that. There's no other emotion necessary.

We've gone back to worrying about silly, trivial issues here and it's only been 3 3/4 years since they attacked us. If they are honest (and that is debatable) these folks targeting us have been carrying the water for a thousand years of hate.

Remember the strength that wrote these words?

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by the Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

We're going to need to have better staying power than that contained in 3 3/4 years.

Here's Johnny Utah

2005-07-06T07:36:00.000-07:00

Point Break (1991)

You know this movie has become a new favorite to me...and I can't explain why. Maybe it's because the older I get the cooler Patrick Swayze becomes.

Keanu Reeves has also been growing in my favor ever since Matrix. Granted, he can't act. However, when playing a hapless surfer-dude or a confused man who is lost in a world he doesn't understand, he's perfect.

Point Break for all that it has wrong with it, holds up over time. The scenes are well shot, Gary Busse adds an effective comic relief and the story is almost captivating. Point Break doesn't have "the low spot" either. Days of Thunder, for instance is similar to Point Break in its production, but DoT has a massive, gutter-like low-spot right in the middle of it. The trench occurs when Rowdie and Cole crash and rowdy gets brain-blood and Cole starts swooning over Nicole Kidman. With DoT you watch the first 40 minutes, the last 40 minutes and skip what's in between.

I give full credit for the absence of a trench to Patrick Swayze. There easily is a ravine written into the script. It would normally come when Johnny Utah infiltrates the surfer gang and starts hanging out at their house and falling madly and inexplicably in love with Tyler. The movie doesn't collapse though because Swayze brings the same presense to the scenes that he brought in RoadHouse. I'll hate myself for saying this, but the guy is a lot like Eastwood. Even a rotten scene is tollerable if he's in it. Swayze even made Ghost tollerable-- well almost. One Whoopi can't be balanced out by a dozen Swayzes.

Fast cars and slow lawmakers or the Fast and the Ludicrous.

2005-07-05T09:16:00.000-07:00

Wow, what a weekend.

Left on Friday for Kansas Speedway to catch the NASCAR Craftsman Trucks, ARCA Remax and Indy car race over the weekend. Fantastic. What a beautiful few days in the sun.

My fondness for Danica Patrick has grown. What a great race she ran on Sunday and were it not for the Tony Eury-esque pit crew she'd have done better than the 5th place finish she scored. Let's hope that in 2007 we see Jason Leffler out of the 11 Nextel Cup car and Danica racing along side Tony Stewart for Gibbs. This open-wheeler is going places.

Once again, Danica got a chance to shut the media up as well. She won the pole in Kansas and after doing so a reporter asked (to paraphrase) "How does it feel to have made history today?". Her answer was priceless "Well, Sara Fisher won a pole last year so I really don't think there was anything historic about mine". With one sentence she gave two answers: 1. Stupid question goof ball. 2. You don't even know what you're talking about.

The truck race was also fun. The only downside was the group of drunken 21 year olds behind us who had their very first beer that day. With their screaming, swearing and spilling of lemonade on me, they were a joy to behold. Two of them passed out and they all stumbled out about 3/4 through the race having been cut-off by the beer vendors. The good thing about racing is that once the green flag dropped you couldn't hear them anymore. If it weren't for the lemonade they spilled on me I wouldn't have known they were there at all (and at 90+ degrees the lemonade didn't feel all that bad anyway).

Speaking of folks who should be cutoff, while gone I see they shut down the Minnesota government due to a budget impasse. I want a law passed that says that failure to reach a budget agreement rolls the previous budget forward. They can make do with what they had last time then if they can't get their ducks in a row.

All the way south on interstate 35 in Minnesota we saw the rest areas closed. Signs everywhere and pylons by the dozens blocking the entrances. What a farce. There apparently is budget for spending 3 hours closing a rest stop, but not to swish the toilets once a day. If this shutdown is like the ones of the past, the state employees will get paid for this outage-- they'll get retro pay as soon as they come back to work.

Of course, the state employees are not working to earn this pay. They didn't choose to show up anyway. No, they're on paid vacation. I guess if they're not being paid, you can't ask them to work for free. I'm sure these folks are caught in the middle. However, I have a bias. The "essential" government workers are still working because they are "essential". Those out of work are those that are not essential to the workings of the state. I guess, if it were me I couldn't sleep at night knowing that my non-essential job is funded by taking 10-20 percent of somebody else's salary. Given that, I sure couldn't stomach the idea of taking a week or two off with deferred compensation to take part in what is a grand illusion. The government and its paperwork and the complicit accomplices in its legion of employees further an ever growing drain on our economy, our livelihoods and our freedoms. Every two years they demand a little more and now they are effectively on strike. You know what? Go get a job that contributes to the economy instead of leaching off it. Go generate something instead of continuing to weaken your host. Harsh? Maybe, but I know the first hour I spent at my job today went to fund a non-essential employee who today might be sitting at home watching Dr Phil and getting an unplanned paid vacation. That irks me a bit.

But, to speak practically and as a citizen, unlike those who call themselves no-government men, I ask for, not at one no government, but at once a better government. Let every man make known what kind of government would command his respect, and that will be one step toward obtaining it.
...
The mass of men serve the state thus, not as men mainly, but as machines, with their bodies. They are the standing army, and the militia, jailers, constables etc. In most cases there is no free exercise whatever of the judgment or of the moral sense; but they put themselves on a level with wood and earth and stones; and wooden men can perhaps be manufactured that will serve the purpose as well. Such command no more respect than men of straw or a lump of dirt. They have the same sort of worth only as horses and dogs. (Henry David Thoreau, Civil Disobedience)

Join 3 aspiring comics, 10 washed-up drug-attic child stars and pop icons as they determine the 25 best attempts at low-budget television

2005-06-27T05:59:00.000-07:00

VH1.com : Shows : The Greatest : 40 Hottest Rock Star Girlfriends... and Wives (20 - 1) : Episode

Worse than the reality TV craze, is the list-TV craze. 25 best rock girlfriends, 100 worst love songs, 60 greatest NASCAR moments, TVs 100 most shocking moments, etc. All of these shows have the same basic formulaic content: kooky pop-culture celebrities known for their past and nearly forgotten successes or vast and natorious public records issue pithy and useless retorts about whatever unimportant and useless topic that lay before them.

I thought enternainment reporters were the most shallow in Hollywood. That theory was wrong I'm afraid. For the Joan Rivers of the world have been outdone by the nameless goofs that bounce around on these list shows. My least favorite among them: the aspiring comic desperate for attention. When these guys deliver their 12 second vignette on the tackiness of Mr. Huxtable's sweaters, you can tell that what they are giving you is their best. For that, you feel sorry for them. This little nugget of perceived hilarity is to them like a diamond formed from 20 years of emotional coal.

You also have rare moments of bizarre duality in these programs such as when a member of Menudo might prostletize on how to make it in the music industry when making fun of Brittany Spears.

I'll admit, I've watched these shows. Obviously, I have seen them or I couldn't comment on them. What I see though is not entertainment. What I see is a pork and beans display. I bet that simile fell flat...here's what I mean:

When you go into a grocery store, you have aisles upon aisles of food. Varying by type and brand, you could spend days cataloging it all. However, in this sea of variety and at the end of an aisle there might be a bean display. What could be more simplistic than a can of pork and beans? Even a 12-foot high pyramid of the product can do little to sell the brand. What it can do, is get you to stop and look for a moment and piling up beans is easy marketing. That by Giza-esque pile before you is 90% filler.

That is what the "25 greatest..." is to me: filler. Cheap to produce, imeasurably cheap to market and even cheaper to cast. These shows are VH1 or E! tv's pork and bean display. They tasked a pimple-faced 17 year-old to put it together to make customers pause as they pass by. It would be ingenious if not for the fact that the prolific nature of these shows has eroded the amount of actual worth-while shows on TV.

20 years from now when "I love the 2000's" comes on, we'll be treated to an aged Paris Hilton and a 10-times divorced Jennifer Willbanks recounting for us the silliness we breeders all displayed when rushing out to buy iPods and Swiffer-wet. By then there will be exactly 2 hours of actual programming on the 2000 channels we're likely have. Hour one belongs to Doctor Phil. Hour two will be auctioned off on eBay.

F1? no, FU.

2005-06-20T08:30:00.000-07:00

In case you didn't watch the "race", you can read about it here. Oh, and so you can hate Eccelstone as much as Michelin, read this too.

I couldn't help but realize that this is where you see a distinction between F1 and NASCAR. In F1, politics is part of the series. Money drama, contract drama, manufacturer drama and concord drama. NASCAR has drama too, but it's mostly juvenile hijinks involving a grudge over "he pushed me".

I flipped between the NASCAR Nextel Cup race at Michigan (yawn) and the farce that was the US Grand Prix in Indianapolis. The GP finished just as the parade lap in Michigan began. I was struck that this more than anything shows the strength of the Franz family and NASCAR's management. For all the goofiness and shallow glitz, NASCAR is a solid product. F1 is about to fracture.

By mid race there were already rumors that the Michelin pull-out was a convenient excuse to widen the feud between the FIA, Ferrari and everybody else. A new concord agreement in the wings and talk of teams splitting away from Eccelstone to create a competing series fueled conspiracy theorists.

The best assessment I think came from Speed's announcers. Bob Varsha and David Hobbs defy commonly understood paradigms and present an intelligent and entertaining F1 race at every outing. Yesterday's USGP was no different. Hobb's made a couple good observations, notably at lap 3 he exasperatingly noted that the FIA was shooting themselves in the foot in "the largest consumer market in the world". Later, Hobbs pointed out the absurdity in the binary reaction to Michelin taking to the track. To paraphrase he pointed out that the idea of a 6-degree banking being too dangerous to manage was probably drawing large roars of laughter from the educated American racing fans; who are used to and demand competitive on the edge racing lap after lap. Afterall, I think Steve Kinser would've taken Kimi Raikonen's Mercedes out if he would've been allowed. Of course, he'd of wanted them to hose down turn 13 first so he could fishtail his way onto the straightaway.

Sure, the tire manufacture said the tires were unsafe. Yes, we would all be sad today if instead of the long line of fans leaving the stadium before the race's end we saw a line of body bags. There were solutions though and I place the blame mostly on the Michelin teams. To take the formation lap and then park the car was a slap in the face to the American fans. Without any concession from the FIA, the teams could've taken to the track and slowed down in turn 13. It could've been done and it could've been done safely. These are multi-million dollar technological marvels-- not just race cars. The drivers could've been alerted to dangerous circumstances and taken the car into a safe area if slowing down would've caused a bottle-neck.

However, in the end the answer should've come from the FIA. The FIA for the sake of their damn rules ruined a fantastic event. This race may not happen here again. Would you buy a ticket? What the FIA should've done is not put in the chicane on turn 13 as the Michelin teams wanted. Instead, the FIA should've allowed the Michelin teams to use the tires Michelin air-lifted in Saturday night to replace the primary and secondary sets they had ruled unsafe. Let the teams re-qualify if you want. Take all the Michelin teams out of the points (as happened anyway), but for goodness sake let the show go on.

Instead, this over-important bureaucracy known as the FIA held more sacred their rules than their fans. As a result... they'll get to keep their rules.

Take two and sue me in the morning.

2005-06-17T08:52:00.000-07:00

Why do journalists continue to tiptoe around the elephant in the room -- that the only real solution to high drug prices in the United States is national price controls ("Rx provocation / Feds could use some," June 14)?

Expanding access to drugs regulated by other countries is a coward's way out. Our elected representatives should not be let off the hook so easily. Readers and voters deserve better information.

Cathy Waldhauser,

Golden Valley. - Star Tribune letter to the editor.

mmm, nothing like amphetamines in my coffee.

Price controls create shortages. Hasn't that been proven enough? If drug companies can't charge as much for their product they won't make as much. Why? Well, because they won't be able to employ as many people, have as elaborate a distribution chain or take advantage of market dynamics. Further, all that excess capital that goes into creating drugs and offsetting debt incurred through research now dries up. That means less drugs by type as well as quantity. So, no more miracles in erectile disfunction. We all go back to chewable aspirin and Goody's headache powder.

Does anybody realize how much money the drug companies have saved us? Sure, there are pills that are $100 a piece. However, that pill taken every 4 hours or so keeps somebody out of a $500 an hour hospital bed. This assumption that drug companies are evil is naive. Of course it's a business and of course there's margin built into the price. However, I wonder if people like Cathy above have ever wondered why?

First off, drug companies spend millions on research to create these pills. Then, they can't sell them until the FDA approves them-- a process that could take years. Companies selling generics, like Sandoz, can sell those pills for cheaper because they haven't incurred the opportunity cost for creating the pill. For example, if I make a widget, I must be able to sell it for at least the cost of what it took to produce it. If I can't sell it for more than it cost to create, then my business plan is phooey, to be technical. Now once I create the widget let's say bill next door starts duplicating and selling them too. Bill didn't have the upfront costs I had. Bill only has duplication costs.

Secondly, a company must protect itself against lawsuits. Nobody demonizes drug companies more than lawyers; And lawyers love to sue drug companies. The drug companies are forced to protect themselves through pricing against a class action lawsuit nightmare. Now, you may be assuming that the drug companies are cutting corners and forcing unsafe medicines on the market just to consume more and more money from vulnerable people. However, if that's the case what exactly does the FDA do?

Why is it that Merck can be now facing numerous lawsuits over Vioxx, but the FDA faces no retribution? The FDA approved Vioxx in 1999 as an arthritis treatment. Merck through its own subsequent research (after it was released to the market and the evil drug company was harvesting revenue) found increased risk of heart attacks in the use of Vioxx. Merck contacted the FDA and announced that they would be pulling Vioxx off the market in September of 2004. This seems like the way a company should work. They create a thing, they send that thing through the necessary channels and it gets approved. They then continue to make sure the thing they created is safe. After all this they find a serious flaw and instead of hiding it (obviously the FDA wasn't looking) they announce it and pull it off the shelves. How do we thank them? We all piss and moan about their profit margin and sue them.

And you wonder why big companies don't treat the public well.

I want a screen door that locks.

2005-06-16T12:28:00.000-07:00

What in the hell is with the chyrons? Those little things they put at the bottom of the screen during tv shows to sneak in advertising or announce the name of the channel? When did this become ok to do?

I remember when I was a kid it was an absolute no-no for a DJ to talk over the beginning or end of a song. It was unheard of, it was annoying and disruptive. Same goes for TV. You got an add between the last scene and the preview of next week's episode, but you weren't bombarded with footnotes and flash throughout the broadcast.

Some of this new fad is born of technology. In the 70's and 80's all the networks could do was the crawl. That arial typed yellow ribbon of storm advisories and sports pre-emptions. Today, the chyrons are animated and are eating more and more of the screen. They [the network suits] want to grab your attention so they wipe across the screen some sort of animated caricature that comes to rest at the base of your TV extolling the greatest new reality show since Ozzie's dog pooped in the house. Now, they are even making noise!

Do you remember how annoyed we used to get when that stupid BEEP BEEP BEEP would come on when there was a storm warning and it would cause you to miss an entire sentence of dialogue? Now they're doing it with commercials DURING the show you're watching.

We don't do this as humans. Once you have someone's attention we don't interrupt the reason we have their attention to give them information they don't necessarily want. For instance, if you go to buy a car, the salesman talking to you isn't competing with another salesman bouncing about on a trampolene in the background shouting "BIG SALE NEXT WEEK...COME BACK!". It is just not done.

I have the same complaint with web pages. What backward disgruntled graphic arts student decided it would be a good idea to implement those layered, crawling billboard adds that cover half a webpage? How did this become a good idea. I know, I really want hits on my website so what I'll do is piss off everybody who comes here by essentially waving a pizza box an inch from their face while they're trying to read. Good plan, Korky.

Hey I can see my house from atop this soapbox.

I saw it first, 10 minutes late

2005-06-15T13:00:00.000-07:00

Well, apparently I was not the only one to witness the radar glitch during the storm last week:

How'd this stuff about Guy getting fired get started? "Well, I was being flippant with you. He really is on vacation. A long-scheduled vacation." Everybody who works at Hubbard is eventually on a long, scheduled vacation. "All kidding aside, he does not work here anymore," said Hubbard. "As to why that is, we don't talk about personnel issues."

When my phone started ringing off the hook Thursday about Guy's firing, the word was that there was a radar glitch and/or they did not like his work on last week's big storm.

It's a dark day indeed when weather people start getting cut for poor prognosticating. "Don't weather people get it wrong all the time?" said a bemused broadcast source.

Yeah, so the bottom line is that Channel 5 wanted to get rid of Guy.

CJ: Star Tribune June 11, 2005

I'm Back.

2005-06-15T07:56:00.000-07:00

OK, it's been a few days. Apologies. Remember those people I replaced at this job? Well, their absence while good for the company has left me a pile of work the size of one left by King Kong after a 4-ton laxative.

I was watching "Modern Marvels" on the History channel last night and the topic was "Failed Inventions". I like Modern Marvels because I like documentaries about stuff. Documentaries about people are hit or miss. The value of biographies is directly proportional to the value of the person profiled. This is why I have never attached myself to the A&E or Biography channel's "Biography" show. For every Thomas Edison, there's a Scott Baio.

Modern Marvels covers things. Usually intricate things that grew from something small like an idea into an irreplaceable piece in the national puzzle. Humans impact our world and our lives, but humans use "stuff" to do their works. Humans do varied works, but the stuff they use to do it is similar. That's why the stuff of life is more interesting sometimes than the people who use it.

Last night's topic of failed inventions would have been mediocre (we've all heard of the Edsel and those goofy flying machines) if it weren't for the common thread that seemed to run through most of the inventions. A lot of them failed not because they were wacky, but because the government killed them.

Being wacky isn't necessarily a reason for failure. Yes, the invention with a toiletpaper roll attached to hat for portable Kleenex is wacky and doomed for failure. However, wacky sometimes leads itself to a niche market like the pet rock, hula hoop or singing plastic bass. Why were some of these lesser-known inventions killed? Regulation mostly.

Take the flying car for instance. There have been several attempts at a flying car. The Aerocarwas apparently the most widely known and manufactured flying car. So much so, that the site linked here is trumpeting a new incarnation of the idea in Aerocar 2000. Aerocar had some nifty features, a rear PTO for running the propeller when in flight and towable wings for easy transport are just a couple. Its basis for business need was also rather sound. It was 1949, WWII was over and the US was car crazy. Further, we had a lot of people now back in everyday life who just 3 or 4 years earlier were flying planes for the war effort. We had pilots, we had interest and we had expanding traffic needs.

Aerocar never reached acceptance because it was just too wacky for the FAA and the DOT to follow. The government didn't necessarily swoop in and kill it, but because of the harness of red tape, the interesting idea could never get beyond a shrug nationally. More on the Aerocar here.

That's really how government can stifle creativity. The military funds creative, off-the-wall projects, but we all know how creative those military designs can be. Utilitarian to the max. Also, if at its conclusion the project doesn't result in the effective delivery of lethal force the military will cancel it. The rest of government is not about encouraging creativity, but finding creative ways to look for instances where the private sector is rising above regulation.

Today, much of creativity is finding itself in using regulation. There's less stuff and more wealth-creation through understanding how to use government. Sad really. The Internet has within it flat-creativity, but in the three-dimensional sense there really hasn't been a boom in creative projects. Here and there you hear of a college building a solar spatula or of some guy building an odd contraption in his garage, but mostly people get rich quick in realestate.

The purpose of these inventions are three-fold. Getting rich, getting famous and making something neat. Today you get rich suing somebody and get famous by doing something stupid in front of a camera. The real question is will we continue to make something neat if you can't get rich or famous? Well, I guess it depends on why an inventor tries. However, if every time you try you get shutdown by red tape, the business need will surely diminish-- just like the Aerocar.

Clouds to the left of me, Jokers to the right

2005-06-08T07:21:00.000-07:00

Well, last night was the official start of monsoon season in Minnesota. First I heard raindrops outside my window. Then it escalated to hail. Soon, it was nothing but the wet flop of cats and dogs against the siding for the better part of an hour. Fearing that the seventh seal had been opened, we turned on the television and found (after 15 minutes of viewing) that our first choice in meteoroligists was using a radar image that was 30 minutes behind every other channel.

"It's about to hit the metro" he would say. But it never moved. It looked on the screen like it was coming right at us. This huge red and purple blob was looming over us and looked like melted wax scupltures of Carrot top and Prince forming a puddle on our map. Finally we switched channels and there we found that the storm had not only already reached us, but was already leaving the state. Our favorite meteorologist was looking at an old and unrefreshed radar image. We are now looking for a new favorite.

Speaking of storms and inaccurate forecasts of the future using flawed data of the past, Howard Dean has been speaking again. I can't get excited about ol' Howie. I guess I should, he pretty much directly called me a spoiled racist who doesn't work. But you know, here's a guy who lumps me into a group solely because I'm white and then calls me racist. There's got to be some flawed logic in there somewhere if I look hard enough. The poor guy probably has to say such outlandish things to get press or even be heard. He's like when Cher goes on tour. Sure she has a new album to promote, but the crowd still shouts down every song with chants of "SING I GOT YOU BABE!!". Poor, pitiful Dean probably starts his speeches out normal and then gets drowned out with requests for "The Scream" and he has to resort to rattling off spiddle-drenched insults to change the subject.

Notice that politics got very loud and boring at the same time? Granted there's a stark difference between parties and you still have to pay attention, but as wild as these people get the less interesting and worthy of interest it becomes.

The Democrats are supposedly playing "Base Politics", meaning they are tailoring their words to energize their base. I'm in an opposite base and I'm sick of paying attention. Here's the thing. There's really no need for the Republicans to energize me right now because I'm going to vote on the right every time. Even if I would consider a democrat, the stuff that Dean, Biden and the others are saying about me and my side of the equation is so over the top and angry I just couldn't consider lining up with them. So, what's the point here? Is it just to make sure your base stays mad and continues to vote? That seems like an odd strategy. McDonald's doesn't focus their ads on a portrayal of the Burger King as an oppressive monarch. No, they sell their product. Do the dems have any confidence in their product at all?

Perhaps Jay Leno was right the other night when he quipped that Watergate marked the last time the democrats had any ideas worth stealing.

Ad Nauseum

2005-06-06T05:33:00.000-07:00

Several thousand years ago, 10 minutes after the Earth cooled and just as the sky started glowing from a streaking dinosaur killer, I considered going into advertising. I would've been good at it I think-- especially if the world graded on a curve. Most commercials today don't really advertise anything. They target a single demographic and "attempt" to become memorable. See, I always thought commercials should at least intend to be convincing. I would rather a commercial give me the feeling that I should go to the store and buy a thing because I want/need/ it. Most commercials now seem to be aimed to catch a spare kilobyte of space in your mind that will rotate up to the front when you walk by the product in a store. The intent on memorable commercials gives us commercials that are bizarre and abstract. They're like a tire swing in cattle pen-- meant to keep the onlookers passified and distracted.

There are shining examples of good commercials. Cingular has a great series of commercials for their "raising the bar campaign" (play here). First of all, I remember for what product the commercial is advertising. It seems strange that one would list that as a peculiar trait, but how often do you watch a commercial and have no idea what product it is advertising? Cingular's commercials work because they are made by professionals, or so it seems. Other TV commercials are out of focus, jerky and seem to lack any continuity (boy is that an insult for something 30 seconds long). It's as if they scotch taped a camcorder to a folding chair and adlib'd for 30 seconds in from of it. Cingular's ads are cinematic, crisp and thought out. I find myself watching them now, feverishly trying to pick-out where in each scene the powermeter is going to appear. Forget "Where's the Beef?", this one is catchy because I enjoy it. That is a good ad.

Conversely, if I see one more Morgan Brittany Old Navy ad I'm going to climb a watchtower with a rifle ("in my snappy new cargo pants!"). Yes, I do remember for what store the commercial was shilling and yes, it is memorable. However, all it convinced me of was that I need to swing out 10 feet from the doorway when walking by an Old Navy in the mall for fear some of whatever the marketing department was sniffing might waft into my nasal cavity.

I also don't care for the new "stupid husband" trend in TV and radio commercials. Men are now treated one of two ways in ads: drunken single morons scratching themselves and high-fiving touchdowns or blank-faced fat-asses trying to kill themselves with power tools while their wives and children look at them pitifully. Predominantly, the wife is usually shown as mothering the children and the husband in these ads. Remember the Mother's day ads? "Give something back to the woman who gave you so much". Check out the father's day ads that will be rolling now. There'll be no such sentiment "Give dad something that plugs in". Valentines day is the same way, there are tons of ads aimed at men to get them to buy extravagant gifts for the woman in his life, but there is nary a single commercial aimed at women to buy for their counterpart. I think that's odd.

Geico has fantastic ads; especially the caveman ads. Like with Cingular, you watch these ads and keep waiting for the "I saved a bunch of money on my car insurance". They are fantastic. Same goes for most Budweiser ads and the Dodge "That thing got a Hemi?" ads. There are some glimmers of hope out there. However, there's just so much that sucks.

It can't be that the ad agencies are this bad. It has to be that the ads themselves are created by committee and their basis drawn from focus groups and micro-managed demographic targets. How else do you explain those bizarre "Fanta" ads? These odd things are not something anyone would come up with intentionally, they are patch-quilts of ideas taped together to service an audience with an attention span shorter than the time it would take for them to recite every word in their vocabulary (probably under 10 words, 3 of which are variations of "like").

EP- Phoney Home

2005-06-03T08:20:00.000-07:00

Suzanne Williams was a fair choice to take the Eden Prairie Challenge.

Not only has she been there countless times, she is considered the family pro at making sense of the roadway maze that confuses many of the million-plus visitors each month to the stores in and around Eden Prairie Center. "Whenever we go there," she said, "my sister says, 'You're driving!' "

Yet even she got confused during a recent experiment conducted at the request of the Star Tribune. No more than two minutes out of the gate, in fact, she was making her costliest mistake. Asked to navigate from the main freeway to the huge regional mall, she wound up in a 5.9-mile orienteering exercise through a network of back roads.

And she's not alone. Even the Eden Prairie mayor admits it took her years to confidently find her way around town. "You'd almost think," sighed Williams, "they didn't know that people were coming."

They know. And now city officials are poised to act.

The city has hired experts in the new discipline of "wayfinding" to help folks make their way through a network of roads that consultants say is neither "linear nor logical." - Star Tribune

Have you heard of a map? I lived in Eden Prairie for a while and I worked there for 13 years. I can tell you first hand that it is the most stupidly designed city in Minnesota. There are no roads that are straight for more than 100 feet and no easy ways to get from one side of the town to the other. In fact, to get from the East side of town to the West, you would have to change roads at least twice. Same goes for North vs South. That said, it can be figured out. It's not like the roads are re-arranged nightly. Getting from the "main freeway" (which I assume to be 494) to the "huge regional mall" (which I assume is Eden Prairie Center) is probably about the easiest path in Eden Prairie. I'm not sure why these women got so confused, unless they were as goofy as the mayor who thinks hiring a consultant will help them.

Hiring consultants never helps. I wonder how E.P. got in this trouble? Do you think the city council sketched out the roads on their own? No, this is the new growth pattern. They implemented "Coving". Coving is a process by which you remove the traditional Paul Bundy-plaid layout of streets and adopt something that looks like the lines on the back of your thumb . The idea is that the driver sees less tar and more grass, because the nose of the car is always looking out over the edge of a curve and viewing a pristine garden outside a perfectly quaint bungalow home. Or in the case of E.P., you see 3 spindly spirea bushes in front of a Caribou Coffee.

What I am getting at here, is that these goof-ball roads were by design. It was no steamroller of growth that hit a city that wasn't ready. It was not evil developers maximizing space. It was micromanagement by the city (who also mandates the kind of trees you can plant to ensure aesthetic equilibrium) and a worshiping of green-space.

E.P. has other problems. Zoning for one. There are office buildings in E.P. right next door to homes. So those windey roads leading to your upscale, $500,000 house are filled in the morning with bleery-eyed office workers screeching to their cubicle at 10mph over the speed limit. It is a recipe for disaster. Toss in the property tax rate in that town and you wonder how anybody can live there.

Maybe the people who do and stay are simply trapped. Maybe they're like the woman in the article and they got lost 7 years ago and can't get out.

What will these consultants do? My guess is that their action plan won't include a bulldozer and a box full of right-angles. No, I bet we'll get trendy signs. Tall stone arches here and there with inserts of marble or volcanic rock containing etchings of how to get to the next stone arch. Because, when you hire a consultant they will spend 2 years and 2 million dollars and come back to you with the obvious. Put up a sign.

Perhaps they could follow Gotham and put a large indicator light on area attractions. EP Mall could shine a big GAP logo on the passing clouds. Lean Chin could project a visage of Lassie, the library-- a web browser with a naked woman displayed in it.

Good old Eden Prairie. Trying so hard to be Edina, the original home of Minneapolis cake-eaters, but winding up...well winding up.

Deep Throat Ironically not Lewinsky

2005-06-02T05:39:00.000-07:00

Headline today:

"Mom who locked daughter in kennel sentenced to jail"

Removing that threat from my rotation. Thankfully I still have "I'm going to sell you to gypsies" in my quiver.

Hey! We found who deep throat is. Who the hell cares? I always thought Watergate was a scandal that served only the press. Now this old dude comes riding into Washington on Bob Woodward over a path of palm branches and I'm supposed to give a flying f*** in a rolling doughnut? I think not.

In a way, I guess it is a passing of a point in time. I remember when the Titanic was mysterious because "it was never found". Then we found it and it went from creepy to annoying with one Leonardo Dicaprio movie.

Vent moment: I replaced a goof in this job. I never say that, especially not to my staff, but I'll note it here. This morning, I stumbled upon (by stumbled upon I mean wasted 45 minutes trying to find and fix) a problem in a stored procedure. One portion of the code was supposed to look at a string date from the table, interrogate only the month portion (01,02,03,etc) and create a new string date that had used the month, end of month for day and current year. So if it is sent "05152005" it should return "05302005". Real tough right? So this thing is coded to look at the month, and [to pseudocode] "if '01' then return '01312005' if '02' then return '02282005'. What the hell. And he stopped at May which is why it died on the first of June. Forget about the fact that in November (the first date hard-coded) it would start returning 11302004 again. Crimeny. You wonder if these people just liked busy work or had no idea what they were doing. Probably both.

Go, Go Speedracer

2005-06-01T06:48:00.000-07:00

I concur with FW, Danica Patrick must be referenced if only so that this site can be on-record as being onboard.

Did you notice that she looked a lot better at the 500 then she does on Spike TV? On Spike she looks heavily painted and mad. She looked much different at the 500, perhaps TV adds 10 lbs of make-up. She had a great run after showing great speeds in practice and qualifying. However, she is in great equipment. I've written about this before on FW, there will be a woman in NASCAR and maybe even formula 1, as soon as they are put in decent equipment. You just can't win anymore as a part of a start-up team. You need test teams, wind-tunnels of your own, private jets and a staff of engineers.

The thing I liked most about Patrick's performance was how she handled the idiot pit-reporter after the race. The gender-card kept getting thrown and she kept ignoring it. It was not a victory for women everywhere or an against-all-odds heroic attempt. No, it was a rookie who made some mistakes that cost her the pole and the win, but showed great potential and ran a dang good race. I think she recognizes that she has no interest in being some victim or having her talent reduced to a circus act. She's the real deal. I hope we see her in NASCAR soon.

As for great performances at Indy, the announcing team from ABC would not be counted as one of them. You can make fun of NBC and FOX's announcers for NASCAR. However, I would take Benny Parsons and his clone over the two dolts ABC hired to call the 500. The play-by-play dude stuttered and the color man (I don't even know who it was, apologies if he was famous) didn't seem to know where he was. Besides not calling the race smoothly, they kept trying to create romantic phrase about ye ol' brickyard (reminiscent of the Masters), but were so bad at it that they sounded like they were reading bargain greeting cards.

The worst was display from the announcing booth was the last caution of the day, when Wheldon passed Patrick for the lead with 16 laps to go. Wheldon made the pass as they took the yellow. The announcers passed a kidney stone as they reeled for poor, poor Danica. She was so close and now she would have to restart second. Oh, sure misery to follow.

Now anybody who's ever watched a race knows that restarts toward the end of a race are hardest on the leader. When the leader hits the throttle, that means the race has started and everybody can go. The leader can't do that until they get to the agreed upon point in the track (usually just after turn 4) where restarts can take place. Anyone who isn't the leader, can hit the throttle whenever they want as long as they don't pass the car in front of them. 2nd place cars will lay back and anticipate the start and as the leader hits the gas the 2nd place car might be revving at 5k more RPMs than the leader. This was the case at the end of the 500, Wheldon took the green, but Patrick was able to lay back and passed him for the lead by the first corner.

The announcers during the yellow, still bemoaning the sad turn of events that had befallen poor, poor Danica, sent the same idiot pit reporter I mention earlier to speak to Michael Andretti. Andretti owned the Wheldon car. The pit reporter peed on himself blubbering about how excited Andretti must be about being in position to win his first 500 as an owner. Andretti looks at him after the gooey question and says "Well...I don't know about our chances, the leader is a sitting duck on these restarts". The whole while he's talking Andretti is looking at this guy who was probably interviewing professional bowlers last week, and wondering what the hell he could be thinking.

Maybe the best news coming out of Indy is not Danica. Maybe instead it is what this will mean for IRL. I don't think Tony Kanaan or Sam Hornish Jr. is going to build publicity and audience for the IRL. Danica might. I'm sure Cart will be falling all over themselves to get Pamela Lee in a seat before July.

A look back

2005-05-27T06:19:00.000-07:00

Nearly a year ago now, I switched jobs. After having spent 12 years of my life at a job, my first job, I decided to call it quits.

for the last 5 years of my time at that job, hardly a week ever passed where I wasn't asked by somebody, "why are you still here?" . I always had an answer. Sometimes I kept the real answers to myself, but the reasons always seemed to be there; At least until they weren't anymore.

When I realized it was over, it was hard to take. This was not just a job, it had started my career. It was partially responsible for helping me build a family, a house and a comfortable life. I am also a software developer so my work, what I built stayed behind when I left. Maybe this sounds a little too silly, but a man who builds a house can always drive by it and know that he built it. A man who does people's taxes can do them all day for years without ever feeling want for them when they are put away. There are some careers, and mine is one of them, that ask people to create and spend hours, days or months doing it and then turn over ownership of that creation to their employer. It's the way it works and if I wanted to create and distribute something on my own then I would own it, but when you work for some one else the proof of your impact must be left behind and is never available to you again... well, it ain't easy.

The last several years were hard. I still have friends there and I see it in their faces. I see the face I used to see in the mirror. Tired, frustrated, beaten, scared and paranoid. It's sad. I didn't leave because of somebody or some thing. I've always figured that there is going to be somebody or some thing anywhere and you can't run away from them. You have to deal with it. I left because I had no where else to go and I no longer had any affect. My work was improving, but the nature of the business and its management kept canceling my projects after construction. Imagine being a rocking chair maker who takes an order for something unique and special and is given a timeline 2 weeks shorter than is feasible. Imagine he puts his heart and soul into it melding his creativity with his capability and creates exactly what the customer wanted. Then imagine the customer calling and saying "nevermind". Then repeat that 3 times a year. It grates on you. It wears you down. No matter what your work creates, to have it go for nothing is a scar that even a pay check can't heal. It eats at you, it eats at your confidence.

I didn't realize until a month after I was gone that there were other reasons to leave. First off, those sad faces on my friends? I couldn't see them until I left. I looked back and realized that "My God, I was that sad too". It's not good for you or for your health. Each month I've been gone I've felt better. Each month I've been gone I've regained confidence. I didn't realize that the man of 2004 who had grown in his career and in his career skills had half the energy and confidence of the man of 1992. Now, 9 months later I feel it coming back. I'm more daring, more willing to try. I find myself surprised when I do things and they don't fail and the more that is happening the stronger I feel. I never realized it until now, but I had been beaten down and feel sorry for my friends who haven't gotten away.

I think I know what's causing it. I think I know why it is so toxic where I used to be. It's sad, because it used to be a wonderful place and the people with whom I still keep in contact worked there when it was. It's hard to leave something that you hope will get better because it used to be. Yet, just like those financial ads on TV say "Past results are not necessarily an accurate predictor of future gains".

I saw leaders come and go. Most that "went" were fired or quit without impact. However, the recent "supreme leader" has not been fired or quit but is just as incompetent. Having that individual hold their role has allowed them to build an ugly and destructive executive core. That may sound a little extreme, but consider the principles on display:

People are interchangeable.
Information is dangerous.
Ideas have merit only when given by people of high order and any idea given by a person of high order has merit by default.
People are best motivated not by a Pavlovian reward, but instead by fear of retribution.

This core set of values has grown like a vine. Managers get fed up and quit and are replaced by others that fit into this set of ideals or are willing to follow them to save themselves. People are put into a restraining fence. If you go too far you're yanked back and at any time you could be cast away if a person of "high order" decides you no longer matter. Notice something? Every one of the principles I listed is contrary to human nature.

"Team Concepts" that treat everyone as round pegs invariably fail because human nature thrives on specialization. People like to "own" things, no matter how small. Also, pride comes from ownership and an employee who doesn't take pride from his work will give you effort that no one will be proud of.

Hiding information makes people paranoid. An executive must keep secrets and not everyone in the company needs to know everything. However, when you visibly keep things from people (tell them that they are not going to be told), you build an environment of paranoia. You also build one jim-dandy of a grapevine. And we all know how good gossip is for a company.

Everybody has stupid ideas, but when you force people to follow a stupid idea just because the "right" person came up with it you also dictate a response of low effort. Look at my situation, do you think those projects got cancelled after construction because they changed their mind? No, bad ideas will eventually collapse.

Finally, forcing people to work is much different than incenting and empowering them to excel. Anyone who can't understand why that is, won't relate to anything I've wrote here.

You see, this absence of human nature as a central idea of how to lead is why people are alienated. The people who work this way don't want to empower people or hear their ideas or divulge information in hopes to gain more information in return. Why? As Mel Brookes said in Blazing Saddles "Gentlemen, we've got to protect our phoney baloney jobs!".

To all my friends who are still there, I know it is hard to leave. I know that finding another job is probably the hardest and most difficult thing to do when you have one that seems stable. I would never tell anyone to do anything as it relates to their career. I can say that from my experience and from my assessment of the situation, my leaving was the best choice I've made in years. The change in my life was equal to when I got married. I got happier, healthier and I can't imagine going back to the way things were.

All work and no play makes Jack normal

2005-05-26T07:33:00.000-07:00

Man, this week has been a one dash after another-- as evidenced my lack of posting. I have a stack of crap a mile high and my threshold for crap-stacks is only 4,280 feet; so I am coming up short.

I'm off tomorrow though. I am volunteering at my daughter's track and field day at school. I am working one of the relay races and I plan to be brutal. These little curtain-climbers better not false-start or cross-lanes before the first turn or it is going to be public and instant humiliation.

"Hey you, fat kid! You're in lanes 8 AND 9".

Anyway, it should be a good day unless it is raining. If it rains I hope they cancel. If they don't cancel that means it will probably be held inside a gym. Imagine it. Hundreds of screaming k-8th graders screaming with squeaking tennis shoes in some 400 degree god-forsaken gymnasium. I think I will call in sick in that event.

I had my post-op appointment this morning. 2+ weeks since they ripped out my gal bladder with bottle opener and I feel pretty good. The pre-op appointment lasted about 3.5 minutes and when the bill came I found out it cost $283. The post-op appointment lasted 1.5 minutes and will likely cost $120. I suppose it was worth it though. I don't seem to have any side-effects and haven't had to change my diet or routine. Maybe in this case I got what I paid for. Good thing I didn't opt to have it done by a talented circuit-breaker salesman in the bathroom of a Conoco station outside Des Moines.

Memorial day weekend fast approaches. Remember, flags are half-staff until noon Monday and then it's right to the top after that. Taking tomorrow off means 4-day weekend which really means that Tuesday will be a very long day next week. If this week is any signal to what next week will bring, losing Friday and Monday will probably mean that I will have to squeeze 25 hours of work into each of the 4 days remaining in the next work week. Perhaps I could clone myself? I bet Radio Shack has some sort of kit or collection of diodes that I guy could use to build a cloning machine. It doesn't matter if it works, I could just sell it on eBay. If you had a cloning machine and it duplicated anything, would you ever have to build a second one?

Thanks for Nothin

2005-05-23T19:46:00.000-07:00

Standing with a group of 13 other senators, seven from each party, Sen. John McCain (search), R-Ariz., told reporters that lawmakers had brokered a compromise pledging their "mutual trust and confidence" in the deal. - Fox News.com

So in other words they pledged nothing. Thanks for the effort. As PJ O'Rourke said, "A compromise is when the shark eats half of you". In this case the sharks wear suits, make compromises with each other and eat us.

So they brokered a deal to allow some of the judicial nominees to be appointed, some not and to leave the rules the same. I'm sorry, exactly what the hell did you agree to? To do nothing? Isn't that pretty much where we are right now? Oh yeah, McCain, you have their "trust and confidence"-- forgot that part. I'm sure that means this time everybody will stop acting like $200,000 weenies.

Of course, if they don't at least Senator McCain got to run out on T.V. extolling the virtue of Washington's only religion-- the compromise. Thou shalt not kill? Please... what if baby-daddy was actually the girl's reincarnated great grandfather? I mean that's basically incest. Thou shalt not steal? Hey, the community built all that wealth the community should be able to take back at least 60 percent of it. Covet? Are you kidding me? One man's "coveting" is another man's "marriage". It's very complicated, you wouldn't understand. Afterall, you're not wearing this fancy suit and still have to buy your own stamps.

I've been busy lately. Up to my arse in being up to my arse in things that keep my arse out of debt. As a result the state of my afore mentioned arse, I have not had time to give a great deal of thought to these pin-striped wonders. Bliss I tell you. It has been sheer bliss. However, the absence of contemplative pause does not mean that one doesn't understand and follow the goings on in the marbled foyers and gilded urinals of the capitol. After all, not much thought is required to sum these fellows up.

I am not a "they're all the same" sort of cop-out artist. I am not so apathetic as to look at the whole of Washington, shrug it off as if it were an ingrown hair and go on about the business of Dr Phil. I realize they are not all the same in Washington. Some are are shadey, some are greasy. Some are lawyers and others have been defended by them. I suppose if you dig deep enough you could find one principled fellow or madam in the group, but they aren't doing much to clear away the dirt and debris on their own.

If Mr. Smith went to Washington today, I scarce believe he would filibuster due process. Yet, that's what the left is doing. How dare we "vote"? How simple-minded and feeble. As if these people on the right should get their way just because there are more of them-- what a disgusting display of strength and power-- why it's like they think they are relevant. The right has no strong individuals either it would seem. How do I know? Because who ran out on the capital steps with his white flag in one hand, his TV make-up in the other and his tail between his legs? Why none other than John McCain. The war-hero that he is should probably not be judged so harshly by me, yet I'll be darned if he isn't the first to announce that he's playing an instrumental part in the dismantling of his own party's agenda. Again.

There does seem to be one principled man in Washington. The President has held ground on more things than most of his party. That's probably why he doesn't get much help. There's not much he can do, but I hope he gathers his speech writers in a room and puts together one damn good shame on you speech. Maybe it would go like this:

My fellow Americans. Tonight we rest comfortably in the arms of freedom. We are kept warm by the light of liberty's torch and rocked to a comfortable sleep by the rhythmic drum of the infantry who cleared this place for us to rest. Tonight we all shine quietly as a singular beacon of hope for the world and an example for all who wish to see it.

We keep our documents under glass. The Declaration, The Constitution. We shelter them, we keep them safe from the ill winds of politics and of war. Yet, the spirit of liberty which first dipped the quill that inked these articles is not in any museum or library; But it is on display. The honor that carried the flag up Iwo Jima has kept us standing straight and the sacrifice that the tore the flag at Gettysburg has held our land together in the years that have followed.

Liberty, freedom, honor live not within these shores. Not within our documents, our monuments nor our buildings. Liberty is not bought with money or jewels. Freedom is not won through blood. Honor is not inherited. These are all a gift, a treasured warmth at the center of all and are unmistakable.

Today, what lays at our center is not a debate on procedure. It is not a question of constitutional wordplay or linguistical legal legerdemain. It is a question of American or not.

I have been accused of not being nuanced before. Of not seeing the gray; only black and white. But I ask you, is using technicalities of rules to hide from allowing our representatives to vote American?

Is using one's power as an elected official to circumvent the understood process of the congress for party or personal belief American?

Is putting one's self above the people one represents and standing in the way of the legal and most fundamental democratic activity, a vote, American?

Is sitting here in this beautiful house at this desk where I've seen American blood drip from CIA intelligence briefings-- is sitting here and saying nothing about this travesty down the street American?

I could, I could tell you I'm disappointed. I could tell you that I had wished that the Congress would find it within themselves to do what was right. I could say all those things you probably guess a politician would say. First, I am an American and I think that it is only and uniquely American to say that what has happened today is not. This compromise this affirmation of the status quo has shown our country that our congress can endeavor to say much and do nothing. They can ere on the side of caution and ignore their duty.

Tonight, we sit here in the shadows of great men who've walked before us. Do we take our walk? Or do we decide that today's the day we decide to just turn back.

Thank You

The red rocker and the all-stars, these are a few of my fav...

2005-05-23T07:15:00.000-07:00

You ever wake up in the morning and decide the day would be best spent drinking Old Milwaukee under an overpass making "blast-the-horn" gestures to passing semis? That's the way I'm feeling today. I think I should shut down this machine, roll back in my chair and scream the names of random cartoon characters until they ask me to go home.

Today I have a mood of unparalleled complacency. I would be concerned about it, but I just don't seem to give a damn. Today's mood is an improvement on yesterday where I reached a new milestone in the search for essence of jerk. Perhaps men get PMS, if so it would explain yesterday. I was a cactus, get near me and you get hurt. All things being equal I am happier not giving a damn than when I damn everything.

Last night I gave my son a bath. In doing so, I pulled him from the tub and looked at him. There he sat struggling in clothes that didn't fit right, skin white and blushed, hair going every-which-way and screaming nonsense. At that moment it occurred to me: He's two and has reached a state of Sammy Hagar. I'm off to buy him orange parachute pants and converse hi-tops today.

I wrote about Dale Jr. last week. After Saturday's all-star race I've decide that I should add an extra exclamation point to that thoughtful bit of examination: The 8 officially stinks. They better do something and fast.

The All-Star race for NASCAR is rivaling the championship banquet for "most boring NASCAR event". 45 minutes of racing, 2 hours of fluff and BS. The worst part is the driver/team introductions. My God, I don't know if they are being introduced or launched from a KMart poster display. It was smoke, fireworks, yawns and overly exhuberant drunks as far as the eye could see. The staged mosh pit in front of the dais was filled with an appropriate mix of all gender and ethnic groups; all with a look of "hey they gave me a free hat" on their faces. Oh, and naturally, we were assaulted with the latest and greatest of obnoxious rap music throughout.

Saving the race weekend was the F1 race in Monaco. Man that is a beautiful track. Mercedes dominated, winning by nearly 16 seconds. However, the battle for 3rd among 5 cars was spectacular at the end. All that excitement and no rap music or fireworks. Huh, who came up with that weird idea?

If my mood improves, I may post a more thoughtful rant. However, as I said I don't just have a devil-may-care mood, I have a anybody-may-care mood. Which is why I am stream-of-conscience blogging. Oh, that's a good idea. I may try that some time. One sentence after another in order as received from my cerebrum (FIFO style). That'd be cool, unless it's a list for lawn maintenance, in which case I apologize in advance.

Wiki, to the bat cave!

2005-05-18T05:48:00.000-07:00

I was researching something this morning and stumbled onto this paragraph within the wikipedia definition of quantum:

Behind this, one finds the fundamental notion that a physical property may be "quantized", referred to as "quantization". This means that the magnitude can take on only certain numerical values, rather than any value, at least within a range. For example, the energy of an electron bound to an atom (at rest) is quantized. This accounts for the stability of atoms, and matter in general.

This is a case where the use of the term in a sentence did nothing to help me understand what it was. I especially enjoyed the "(at rest)" classification. Yes, that helped.

Wiki has become my favorite part of the web. Wiki [wiki wiki] is Hawaiian for "quick" and in the case of wikipedia is used to describe a dynamic encyclopedia of information. Wiki is unique because it can be added to by anybody. Of course, the content gets reviewed and your entry, should you make one, could get "voted" for deletion, but if you are an expert on a common thing or term this might be your chance to document your understanding of the subject.

For instance, the Wiki definition for marriage even includes references to "Trophy Wife" and this reference:

There are also many monogamous societies, where a marriage consists of only two people, a very few polyandrous, where a woman could have multiple husbands. Societies which permit group marriage are extremely rare, but have existed in utopian societies such as the Oneida Community.

This is good information if for no other reason it made me actually think about group marriage. What in the hell would you be thinking to want group marriage? Is this just sportsmanship run amuck? I mean I shook hands after football games and had pizza. I did not kiss the opposing linebacker and receive toaster gifts.

Group marriage. The phrase is just wrong. So you get 6 of your closest friends and all marry each other. How bad would you feel if after 18 months you were the first one divorced? 6 of your best friends got together in the kitchen one night and all voted that they have "had it up to here with your BS". That is a potential cause for a mental health disorder.

With this concept, Dick Van Dycke could have married June Cleaver and Marion Cunningham. Of course, throw in Jeannie and it might have gotten interesting. Nah, it would have never worked. A 1960's rambler would never have a bedroom large enough to fit 5 twin beds.

I think wiki has potential as an information gathering devise for the relative. Items that are not yes or no or true or false. I read the dictonary.com definition for marriage and I don't agree with every sentiment. I don't agree with each portion of the Wiki definition either, but I at least have a say in that one.

Over hill...Over Dale?

2005-05-17T06:15:00.000-07:00

So I watched Dale Jr at Kansas Speedway 2 years ago go around in circles in 30th place for 3 hours. Jr has had a feast or famine career for sure, but I can't quite tell if this new crew chief and stable of cars is boding well for the future or not.

Dale Jr has finished in the top 15 for the last 8 races. Before that, things were not too good. Dominance at plate tracks had seem to have transferred to Hendrick and the flat-track (like Kansas) performances were not improving (42nd at Las Vegas, 32nd in California).

Dale Jr always seemed to give up when things were going poorly. Last weekend at Richmond, most of the race he spent near the tail-end of the lead lap or one lap down going in circles. Whining on the radio and not going anywhere. Same problems as previous years. If you get the 8 out front, he's tenacious, but give him mediocrity in a car and you'll get a mediocre effort.

In past years, Jr has had one of the Two Eury's (Tony or Tony... you can't make this stuff up) running his crew. In defense of Jr's performance habits, in past years why should he try harder when these two have proven they couldn't tune a cup car? Yes, these three together had great success in the Busch series and also had great success early on with the plate races. However, since Dale Earnhardt died and since everybody else caught up on the plate engines the wins didn't come so easy. These three together have not proven to be able to keep up with a changing car or conditions or to be able to make the necessary adjustments other teams can make to improve. Chad Knaus(48) or Matt Borland(12) have had wild success and in part thanks to their drivers, but also due to their unique abilities to build, modify and tweak race cars. Why not give up? If the car your in will not improve as fast as everybody else you've got no chance.

In the last 8 races we've seen Jr's new Chief, Pete Rondeau, gel with Jr. Well, sort of. We've seen Pete fix the car. On Saturday at Richmond, once the car was better we saw Jr re-invigorated (sort of) and move forward. So now the question really has become how much of the past mediocrity was a Eury problem and how much was Jr? If Rondeau can now build a consistent and improving car, can Jr trust in that and perform consistently as well?

I don't know the answer to that, but perhaps the next several races will show it. Matt Kenseth has been able to show the kind of concrete stability that Dale Jr needs. It's that consistency that quietly won Kenseth the last Winston Cup. Kenseth qualifies horribly and usually has to come all the way through the field adjusting as he goes. Dale Jr needs that kind of persistence and the next several weeks will tell the tale. Will this Rondeau keep up and will Dale Jr handle it if he does?

All this and Grace Kelly Too.

2005-05-16T08:43:00.000-07:00

Alfred Hitchcock never won an academy award for a film. He won a "lifetime achievement award" for which his speech consisted of only two words: "Thank You". I think, he probably might have preferred to say "piss off" at that point, but he thought better of it.

Hitchcock received popular acclaim measured perhaps in the most pure fashion: boxoffice totals and film longevity. Hitchcock made his movies for the audience, something that doesn't win you artistic awards in Hollywood. Films made for the consumer are considered shallow and if you look at things like Smokey and the Bandit, No Holds Barred and Superman III it would be hard to argue. However, Hitchcock mixed the art-house films he loved with an understanding of the audience and created gorgeous movies that everyone wanted to see. However, as I discussed in my post on Modern Art, art is not in the eye of the beholder. Art or the critique of art is based on the premise that if it is popular to the masses it must be pedestrian.

Hitchcock started with great silent classics like The Lodger where his unique skills in cinematography came to light. He used a glass floor and real ceiling to shoot a double-exposed scene of a man pacing from below. The end result is that you see glimpses of an opaque figure pacing back and forth in the apartment above fading in and out of the darkened plaster. This of course lends nothing to the story, but the audience is tweaked ever so slightly into apprehension and that was his goal.

Hitchcock also did the unthinkable for an artist: TV. Alfred Hitchcock was innovative for sure, but he was also fearless. Spielberg might make a mini-series and Afleck may produce an independent-film series, but no big name would put out a weekly series on network television and lend his name AND face to each show. The only people in Hollywood who are willing to do this are those who are desperate. Hitchcock, was not desperate, he loved to present to the audience.

Today, it seems that most in the theater would prefer that the curtain never be raised. Instead, hang a mirror on the back of it and let them perform for their own personal pleasure. To please the audience is a nice side-effect of a project, but to set forth with that as a goal is unthinkable and certainly not worthy of reward. The theater has become a stage for the audience to be challenged rather than entertained. Hitchcock built an audience with quality and understanding. He may have used tricks in his photography, but there were no tricks in his acquisition of a following.

The thing about Hitchcock that I love, is that there is such attention to detail. The music, the camera work and the story are all wound together and constructed for my perspective. That's what it feels like when you watch Strangers on a Train, as if it were filmed just for your amusement and understanding. This is what Hitchcock could do that no one else since has been able to. Coppola can paint a beautiful picture, McTiernan can hold your heart in your throat, but only Hitchcock and give you a movie that feels like it was tailor made for you-- no matter who you are.

My daughter, when she was 3 wandered into the room while I was watching North by Northwest. I don't think I could underscore my point in the previous paragraph any better than to point out what she did during the 22 minute crop duster scene. This scene is probably Hitchcock's most famous. It's 22 minutes where for the most part, nothing happens until the last few minutes of the scene. You see Cary Grant standing on the side of a dirt road. No dialogue, no music. Yet, its so pervasive and tangible that you can't look away. And that's what happened to my daughter, for 22 minutes at the age of 3 she sat there in front of the TV, without me prodding her to do so. She had rapt attention to something that apparently was as enchanting to a 3-year-old as it was to me.

That's what Hitchcock was and thankfully what he still is. Since his films were bigger than his celebrity, his strength and presence persists today. His attention to the audience didn't just reside in an intention to profit, it lay instead in an understanding of what it means to entertain and how to hold an audience. Awards are given every year, but the kind of product Hitchcock gave us will last for centuries. Maybe that's another reason he never received an award for his films. North by Northwest wasn't the best of 1959, it's timeless and to assign it a year would diminish its impact.

X Marks the Spot

2005-05-13T06:17:00.000-07:00

XBOX 360 may end my need to go outside.

Of course, this isn't a true statement, but it may revolutionize my stereo cabinet. It seems to fill a lot of gaps that I currently have in my media delivery aparatus. First of all, it's carrying a 3.2 ghz processor which means that it will be much more capable than the existing processor (13 times more capable). It also has HD integration and (holding my sutures) network capability for attaching to external drives for mp3 and video streaming.

Currently, I use Airport Express from Apple to stream music to my stereo. This has its benefits. Since I already have an iPod and use iTunes, the AE simply plugs right in. What makes the AE superior over other devices is that it is simply a node on my network, not a peripheral. So, from my computer I can target any AE on my network and stream music to it. Other devices plug into the network and use some attached drive as a source, but controlling the music is done on the device itself. This is annoying because these are single-use devices and require you to be where the device is to control it. With my system, I put the AE in my basement next to a receiver that controls whole-house audio. So, if I wanted to start some music up right now, I just start iTunes from my chair, target that AE node and voila! Bad 80's music on demand.

The nextgen XBox will be integrated into an entertainment system. Gaming, DVD, media distribution, etc. It will solve a lot of short-comings that guys like me end up with when designing a system. However, it will leave a lot too. For instance, the xBox will not be a passive node like my AE, so I will have tune media on the xBox, probably using the TV as a head-device. What will make up for that con is the fact that I no longer am tied to iTunes.

Fishwrench just brought up a good point. The nextgen will probably start at $399. If you haven't got HD tv yet and are relativly happy with your current game console (which I am) why not cough up a couple hundred extra bucks and buy another laptop? It's a good point. When I work from home I remote into my home PC from my laptop to control media and check local email, etc. That flexibility trumps the need to have a more abstract media distribution system. As long as I can be portable and control my system, it doesn't really matter if my system is linear and hard-wired. In other words, if I can have all the control of my computer anywhere in the house then why duplicate parts of my computer just to have that capability at site-specific locations.

I haven't been able to play as many games lately as I would like. I have just way too much going on and what free time I do have I seem to be putting into this blog. However, it's easy to burn an afternoon playing games and its that knowledge that makes me very interested in an upgrade. However, the capabilities in today's games over the games of my youth still blow me away. So, given that understanding the idea of upgrading seems almost nonsensical.

Wait, I was going to write about Hitchcock today. Darn it. OK, this afternoon I promise. 3.2 gigahertz for goodness sake, I couldn't wait on that.

I'm cooking MC's like a pound of bacon

2005-05-12T07:05:00.000-07:00

Day 2 of recovery and it could be worse. Sure, it's 36 degrees outside and pouring rain. Sure, my gut feels like it has 4 holes cut in it (wait it does!). Sure, if I watch one more minute of daytime TV I'm going to climb a clocktower. However, I could decide I'm crazy and fly to South Africa for treatment like Chappelle (maybe he IS Rick James). Or I could've decided to fly to an air show and found myself surrounded by fighter jets with a bitchin' view of the White House. Yeah, those guys are having a worse week than me.

And so is Vanilla Ice, whatever he is doing. I watched a show called "Remaking" on VH1 yesterday and Ice was the subject. They give him meetings with designers, producers and choreographers in an attempt to give his career CPR. This guy is the oldest 12-year-old I have ever seen. A pathetic lost sole who has no idea who he is, but absolutely hates what he was. What an awful way to go through life.

"Still I'm Sad" from Rainbow On Stage just cycled up on iTunes. Man, that's good stuff.

Like I said it's 36 degrees outside and raining. I think this must be what it is like in Europe, cold, dank and rainy. No wonder Europeans are all so pasty white. I gotta tell you, being confined to this house makes this rain a blessing. If it were 82 and sunny I'd be ready to scream. As it is, I like the dreary and dark. Makes you happy to ease back in your chair "work from home".

Sure, I'm coding right now and nagging my employees, but I'm also exploring my music library and writing this. Multi-tasking is wonderful especially when you can mix in the purely trivial. Life just doesn't seem important and fun unless you have a good mix of the trivial. All work and no play-dough makes Geek a dull boy.

My father in law started a blog yesterday called Noise. I'd been nagging him for a while because he is a better writer than I am and has more time to apply to it. I think it should be a good read daily...if he keeps it up. That's the hard part, finding an excuse to write. It is so easy to just forget about it. However, if you like to do it the feeling you get is like soaking your feet after a long day. I've never kept a journal, but I suppose that would be the same concept. There's just so much we go through on a given day that creates a pile of memories and thoughts in your head. You have this cluttered garden-shed in your mind that you need to go through and if you do it once a day you can walk away with a tidy, clean perspective. It's nice. Of course, my wife would rather I could verbalize this stuff with a nice nightly discussion, but I don't work that way. Writing is different. It's odd, but makes sense to me.

Speaking of perspective, I meant to write on Hitchcock today and have forgotten. I may publish that later or tomorrow. Stop back, he was my favorite.

Figure out the title?

Ah, that's better

2005-05-11T10:23:00.000-07:00

Living in America is great when you need healthcare. Sure, you're still apprehensive, but at least you don't have to worry that your surgery will be interrupted by a smattering of gunfire or the need for the medical staff to feed the goats.

Let me tell you a little something about valium. If God's greatest creation was man, man's greatest creation was intravenous valium. If you haven't had it, imagine lying on a serene beach listening to the waves crash against the sand and just when you are about think about getting up somebody grabs your arm, sticks in a needle and you want laugh yourself silly. I can't even describe the calm. I have no idea when they actually gave me the anesthesia, I could have laid there high on valium for 30 minutes for all I know-- the valium gives you amnesia apparently. I only remember about 30 seconds of valium and then instantly I was waking up in the recovery room.

Before you go in for surgery, the nurses explain the procedure and ask you a number of repetitive and seemingly useless questions. "Have you ever had a stroke?" "Do you smoke?" "Do you like pinea colladas?" "Walks in the rain?". All this is to build a health history and to make sure that they haven't switched charts and had me scheduled for Mrs Johnson's hysterectomy.

The strangest questions concern the pain scale.

"The nurses will plan to give you pain medication as necessary to maintain a pain level of 4, is that acceptable?"

Um..yes? So then she says, "would you rather have a 3?" I'm still chewing on what the hell 4 is let alone decide that 3 is better. Imagine if you bought food this way?

"I'd like a burrito supreme please"
"On a scale of 1 to 10 how hungry are you?"
"9"
"Jose we're going to need more plates!"

They continually ask you your name before treating you. I think this is reassuring though because its nice to know that they are careful. However, at a couple of points they would point at a chart and say "Is this you?" and I would say yes and then they would point at some series of consonants and one vowel and say "and is this the procedure you are here for?". I think it was Latin, but I don't know if it said gal bladder removal or the name of some guy who walked around in his bathrobe in 680 BC eating grapes picking camel shit out of his sandals. Finally, by the time I got to the operating room and reached the "A-Team" medical staff they would show me the name of the procedure and add "which means taking out your gal bladder" and I would say YES!

So, at this point I can eat normally and sit upright. I'm not nearly as tired as I was last night or this morning. I do have a fair amount of pain, but I have a greater amount of painkillers so all is well. It feels a lot like I walked into a bar yesterday, found the biggest guy in the place and goosed his girlfriend. Not that I've done that, but I've always assumed that doing so would result in this sort of abdominal discomfort.

As it stands now, I have the rerun of last Friday's Busch race on Speed, I'm dialed into the net with my laptop and I've got bad 80's hair rock streaming from iTunes into the stereo. This is why I am happy to be an out-patient. If I were still in the hospital, I'd be eating runny mashed potatoes, drinking tepid apple juice (incidentally, nothing is worse for a person with a vivid imagination than an 8 ounce glass of warm apple juice) and watching Quincy reruns on one of the 4 channels on the hospital TV.

This is what some hate about American "drive-through" medicine and what I love. Sure, I could be at the hospital being asked my name every 7 minutes and listening to the guy in the next room scream for new underwear, but I think my recliner and painkillers are better.

Post Op

2005-05-11T07:15:00.000-07:00

I am out of the hospital and upright after having my gal bladder out.

At this point I don't seem to miss my gal bladder, but I do miss the Valium they gave me while taking it out. I can eat whatever I wish, but it feels as though I had one darn good fight yesterday.

I'll go into the details later... stay tuned.

Dream Weaver

2005-05-06T05:22:00.000-07:00

Two nights ago I awoke at 2:00 AM coughing like a 70-year chain smoker with asthma rolling in a dust-bin. So, I did the unthinkable: Robutussin in the middle of the night.

I always have detailed and odd dreams. It comes from an over-active imagination and a twisted subconscience. I've dreamt about death, dismemberment and a combination of the two concerning a miscellaneous arrangement of mechanical equipment. I dreamt once that my mother came charging into my bedroom swinging an axe into my forehead. I dreamt once that I saw 180 of a 200 man army company killed during a fire-fight (I remember every face still). I also have bizarre recurring dreams. I often dream that I'm no longer working in a "real job" and am back at the grocery store bagging groceries. I check the schedule on Thursday and realize that I have to work on Friday and I have to find somebody to switch. I wake up sweating. Same sort of thing with the "back in high school dream" where I am late to class and can't remember my locker combination or realize that I've forgotten to go to English class for two months and I'm in danger of flunking.

So, I'm odd. However, that means the dream I had two nights ago is normal...by my standards.

It was a beautiful, bright morning. The sun was refracting through a windshield in front of me and I could see the ebbing and flowing of trees and buildings through the glare as the car moved. I was driving and boy, was I driving. It was a sleek mint green 1978 Lincoln limousine. Chrome dripped from its exterior like chocolate diamonds on a sundae. The interior was green and chrome and spacious. It was my grandmother's house without the smell of cookies. The carpet was care-worn and matted. The seats were cloth and soft and they sat like what a park bench built for a movie theater would feel like. There were vinyl faux belts and chrome buckles sewn into the seat backs and a vinyl armrest beneath my right arm.

The steering wheel hard plastic, with a small hint of wood grain at its center. Through the wheel I could see the gauges. There was no tight cluster of round gauges, instead there was an area like a placemat displaying meters ranging in size from a quarter to a cribbage board.

The car was tangible and tactile. I could smell long days and cleaning products ground into its surfaces. This was not a new car, it was mature, it had life.

I turned a corner and felt a shift. It distracted me enough to look around and I realized the streets I was driving were empty. Desolate, quiet. The sides of the streets were lined with people. Faceless, still; Standing as if glued in place and made of plaster. Hundreds, thousands of people all just standing and watching me roll by. As the car turned right I looked through the passenger window and caught sight of what followed behind me. Five more limos eased in procession. All were black as ebony and their hubcaps shined like they were polished with star-dust. I could see in the windshields of the first couple cars. Gray figures sat behind the steering wheel of each. The first car's driver wore a fedora and I could see the pulsing ember of a cigar in the shadow.

I straightened and saw ahead of me what appeared to be a gathering at the end of the road. These people were not as sullen and empty as the others I saw. They were vibrant, filled with color and vigor. As I approached I saw that the group was mostly women, dressed as if bridesmaids in long, unnaturally formal gowns. They were all smiling bright and carrying flowers. As I passed, they poured the flowers on the car's hood and roof.

It's interesting to me that in dreams you rarely focus on the obvious. You don't hide when attacked, you don't run when scared and you hardly ever ask why. Likewise with this session, it never crossed my mind initially to look behind me, to see who might be riding in the back of the limo. So, I looked, slowly and carefully up into the rear-view mirror and saw the shape of a man. Slumped, still, unshifting. In dreams you tend to know by instinct what in real life you would only trust after tangible proof. I knew in an instant that the man was dead.

I looked ahead to see that the crowd had now parted and in fact, had dissipated to nothing. The caravan I was leading was now traveling off of a road and threw a grassy prairie. The sun that had so brightly shown earlier was now beginning to be masked by a fog. Soon, the fog had overtaken the car. Enveloped it and I couldn't see anything, only the feel of the wheel let me know that it was still in front of me. Then I awoke.

When you think about it and I have, dreams teach us things. Perhaps we've all passed through life looking out our windows at the passers by. All these people and faces who's names we've forgotten stand online in our memory. An endless card-catalog of accidental meetings, careless coincidence and lost affection. You have to wonder what your mind is telling you or if it is telling you anything at all. Is it just the random chemical reaction of the brain during sleep projecting odd images interpreted oddly by a mind that is not operating at capacity? Or, perhaps, should you learn from a vision that tells you that when you look in the mirror you see a dead man and that all you can do is move forward into the fog.

Miscellaneous and Random Computer Post.

2005-05-04T05:42:00.000-07:00

The good thing about working with computers is that at the end of every path is truth. In the end the answers are always either "yes" or "no". There is no sometimes, or if the answer is "sometimes" you are asking the wrong question. Computers don't get things wrong unless they cease being what they are: a machine. When they break, their circuitry no longer communicates or energizes. So, they cease to be a computer and transform themselves into a very expensive and useless dumbbell. What makes us humans stand apart is that when our "circuitry" breaks down, we have other dimensions of being that allows to maintain our purpose; whatever it is. A broken human is human, a broken computer is trash.

Most things humans create are like the computer. They have a purpose. They have a shelf-life. They are usually something that results in truth, where truth is the realization of a need and the resolution to that need. Most things humans create are tools, so this makes sense.
That humans can create things not based on truth or need is what makes us special. Music, paintings, poems-- this blog. There's no yes or no in these things.

Absence of a yes or no is why I could never be a social worker. Knowing that this computer will eventually find truth if I try hard enough keeps you going. There isn't much of that in the sullen eyes of a 16 year-old crack mother or in the labored cries of her crack-baby. The computer never asks me for help, only instruction. It never deviates from my instruction and it may succeed or fail in my eyes, but to its own purpose it always accurate even as it accurately generates a mistake.

You gotta like that kind of constraint. Roofers never walk onto the same roof twice. Electricians fight with varying service levels and parts. Doctors diagnose based on a percentage and treat based on cumulative theory. A computer person will always, at the end of the day find truth in his tools. That's nice.

Now, that said, Windows is not a computer. Windows is to computers what the bobble-head is to plastic.

Tax this

2005-05-03T06:37:00.000-07:00

In the argument over repeal of the national estate tax, which has passed the House and will be before the Senate soon, supporters of repeal frequently assert that the assets of an estate have "already been taxed" and that the estate tax amounts to double taxation. That's not quite right; 36 percent of the value of estates worth more than $1 million comes from untaxed capital gains. For estates over $10 million, 57 percent of their value on average comes from untaxed capital gains. When all the generous exemptions, deductions and special allowances are factored in, there's very little double taxation going on. - Star Tribune Editorial

Kiss my ass. There, succinct and to the point. Thank you and good night.

Can somebody on the left please get a grip-- I mean on something other than somebody else's money? The choice of phrase in this editorial just makes me sick. So as to set a tone early, the writers made the choice to put "already been taxed" in quotes to passively indicate the perceived-silliness of the assertion (conservatives believe money they received as salary was actually "earned" by them). "...36 percent of the value of estates worth more than $1 million comes from untaxed capital gains. For estates over $10 million, 57 percent of their value on average comes from untaxed capital gains." Oh, well what was I thinking. You're right. You're perfectly entitled to swoop in take any damn thing you want. You know, above grandma's wash machine there's a jelly jar with fifty bucks worth of coins she found in the laundry. You better make sure you go harvest that too.

"For estates over $10 million, 57 percent of their value on average comes from untaxed capital gains. When all the generous exemptions, deductions and special allowances are factored in, there's very little double taxation going on." Generous? An estate worth more than 10 million has been funding the government's stupid schemes for probably 50 years. From Ketchup studies to the salaries for the admin assistant's admin assistants for the deputy assistant to the Senator from fill-in-the-state-here. Who's being generous here, the people who saved all their lives and bettered society or the flea-infested crack-house mother who's been sucking funds out of their pocket via the government's deranged forced charity? Want to nit-pick? How about all the money we've thrown down the rat-hole of social engineering projects, failing schools and pork-barrel boondoggles. How much of that money could have actually gone to better society if left where it was doing good instead funding an ever-diminishing moral and societal atmosphere. How much of the gross of the net income that built that 10 million dollar estate has been used to successfully better or even improve society? How much walked out of some big marble building in a bureaucrat's pocket?

What's more, outright repeal of the estate tax would have a devastating effect on philanthropy, which has come to play an ever greater role in underwriting the American social contract as governments at all levels eviscerate programs to help the poor and working poor. All charitable gifts and bequests from large estates are exempt from the estate tax, providing a powerful incentive for the wealthy to be generous.

Yes, and continually sucking money from these people through a socially-engineered tax code or through income redistribution has done nothing to create an incentive for there to be less poor. In fact, we create poor in this country by funding them.

Another favorite argument of those who support repeal is that the estate tax falls heavily on small farms and family-owned businesses. That is simply not true. In 2004, there were only 440 taxable estates in the entire country made up mostly of farm and business assets. Most of those were very large. Farms and businesses worth less than $5 million accounted for less than 2 percent of taxable returns and accounted for only 0.5 percent in tax liability. A small tweak to the current tax could exempt even those 2 percent.

Ok, there aren't many tractors in uptown so I'll grade on a curve here. Have you looked at what machinery and land costs lately? Farming is evolving. The farmers who bought into the government subsidies of the 80's are collapsing. Collapsing because they were paid by the government to remain stagnant and not grow. By not growing, they made no money and either retired with nothing or went out of business-- sold to "large" farms worth more than 5 million. Of the farmers who are left, over the next 20 years it would be hard not to have a farm worth more than 5 million. As an example, a used Case-IH 1997 8930 tractor with 3,000 hours on it is listed at $66,500. A new MX-series Magnum Case-IH carries a price between $101,000 and $160,000 depending on options. A new harvester or combine will cost over a quarter of a million dollars. A farmer within 80 miles of a metro and sitting on 300-500 acres of land is no longer just a small farmer, but is a potential land developer sitting on acreage that could be worth millions as the suburbs expand. But, who cares right? If they have 10 bucks more in their pocket than you and me then we should be able take at least a couple, right?

Second, the community has a legitimate interest in preventing excessive concentrations of wealth over a number of generations. It's not good for anyone when a nation's wealth comes to be concentrated in fewer and fewer hands.

I don't know if that is racist, elitist, stupid or all three. I would argue that concentration of wealth is only bad for society when as PJ O'Rourke once said about the government: "Never let the people with all the money and the people with all the guns be the same people."

There are a number of ways the estate tax could be made less complicated and more equitable without losing the benefits it brings: Raise the caps on the exempt portion of an estate from $1.5 million to $3 million for an individual and $7 million for a couple, or convert it into a true inheritance tax and treat what heirs receive as taxable income. The latter has the salutary effect of reducing the tax as an estate is shared with larger numbers of heirs, thus further reducing wealth concentration.

Yes, by all means. Why just remove the wealth from an estate. Let's first allow it to be transferred and then bankrupt the entire family by taxing their fancy new assets. So your dad owns a home on the river? Better not inherit it or you'll be up a creek when the tax man comes a callin'.

Republicans have done a good job of rhetorically turning the estate tax into the "death tax," which makes it sound cold, hard and greedy. It's none of those things. It's a wholesome and necessary component of our national tax structure...

Yep, I agree and that is precisely why our tax structure is immoral, ugly and killing ingenuity, innovation, entrepreneurialism and family. Perhaps the Star Tribune's editorial staff would rather we all be rationed our pay or credits and no one be allowed to build upon their successes. Perhaps it would be easier if no one could give their children a better start in life than they had or if no person was allowed to grow beyond the limits of the least achievers among us. They can believe that and they can use their stage to profess it. No matter how it is argued, it is still deeply wrong.

Of all the gall

2005-05-02T06:29:00.000-07:00

30-some years of health has given way to 2 months of nagging body issues. First the teeth and now the gal bladder. Soon, I'll just be a head floating in a jar somewhere; using sensors to read electrical activity in my brain for blogging. It will be created by the same people who do close captioning.

"Can you bee leave what the president is heying about the new tacks law? I half about had id. I want to no [quote owl sound] is respond cybil"

The doctors say my gal bladder has to go. You see, in my religion, if any part of my body sins I must cut it out. Hey! This is the 21st century, I'm not going to succumb to some religious doctrine and cut out my gal bladder with a rusty butter knife. I'm going have a professional do it.

The docs say my gal bladder is operating at 20%. So, with the gal bladder all that causes is nausea and pain; As opposed to the heart where operating at 20% would get you hooked up to a battery charger. If your genital works at 20% you start taking baths in front of sunsets and actually enjoying shopping for shoes with your wife-- according to TV.

Next week, the surgeon will insert a few wires into my midsection and remove the gal bladder leaving only a clamp in its place. Well, that's if I pay 60%. They said that if my credit report comes back bad they will remove the gal bladder with a staple puller and clamp it off with a clothespin.

I thought about going to a cheaper place, like where surgeons are in training. Unfortunately, I found that they only exist in Mexico and you have to sign a paper testifying that you are a donkey before they will operate on you.

Part of the reason I do not travel out of the country is the fear that I will need healthcare abroad. I'm sure there are wonderful medical practioners in Haiti, but I have a gal bladder problem not a bullet wound. To contrast, in the U.S. we have legitimate surgeries to insert fake parts. In other countries they have fake surgeries to correct legitimate problems. This and the fact that the incoming and outgoing water pipes on most foreign hospitals are one in the same keep me right here at Park Nicollet.

So next week I won't blog on Tuesday afternoon, but may have a few righteous blogs after I get out of the O.R. and am still trippin' on whatever they give me. Should I write extemporaneously on the glistening nature of hoppie-toads bitchin' back, please forgive me as I am simply high. Same goes if I start talking about politics, but that's worse when I'm sober.

Tipsy

2005-04-29T11:40:00.000-07:00

God I love beer.

It's not just a summer thing and it's not a crush. I have a deep lasting relationship with a beverage.

Why? Nothing else in this world makes me throw up as often or as much. Beer is probably the reason that the button of my pants could snap off and crack the engine block of a Freightliner. Beer has caused me to forget things and given me bad memories. Beer has kept me up at night and made it impossible to wake up in the morning.

Beer is my greatest enemy and without it there's no point in fighting.

I am not automatically suspicious of people who don't drink. There are a great deal of things that most people do that I don't do. I don't obsess about whether my shirt is wrinkled, I have never watched American Idol or CSI, I don't have one of those Lance Armstrong yellow bracelets. Fine, don't drink or only drink wine or margarittas-- whatever... I do not care. What I am suspicious of is people who drink Pepsi-free 362 days a year and then pound Jack Daniels the remaining 3 nights.

I have always referred to New Years Day, St Patrick's Day and SuperBowl Sunday as "amateur Night" at the bar. If you want to have some loser hug you or pee on your shoe, go to the bar on amateur night. Of course, it doesn't always take a holiday. There's those occasions when some idiot at the office happy hour has an adverse reaction from his first real drink and starts dirty dancing with his briefcase.

I went to Vegas a few weeks ago. My lovely wife and I were riding in the elevator to our hotel room at about 2:00 am when the elevator stopped and a group of people boarded to travel up a few floors with us. The boarding procedure of an elevator hasn't really changed much or varied from place to place as far as I can tell. Yet, these folks had difficulties. First, walking in a straight line had reached a level of difficulty that previously was only used to document NASA guidance control operations. The elevator was only 8 foot square, so I am not at all certain why the four individuals needed to speak as loudly as they did. Whatever their reasoning, this group was quite proud of the level of intoxication that they had achieved. So much so that they saw fit to continue drinking in the elevator so as not to loose any of their shimmer on the way back to their rooms. Pawing at each other and anyone else in their wake, these people obviously had no idea how to handle their booze.

I can't remember a single time in which I got so hammered that I didn't still at least function; And I've been hammered. I think that's the difference though, I have a beer or two a day. I don't have 30 beers 2 days a year. In fact, I wouldn't doubt that there are people on St Patrick's day or New Year's day that drink as much as I do for the whole year. However, that's all they drink and they have no idea how to handle themselves.

It's pitiful really. These people use alcohol like the people in Spain use the bulls in the street. They festively get blasted to the point of being a jackass and then collapse. I however do not have that sort of disorder. My only problem is that I have an unnatural affection for Miller. It's difficult, but it's my cross to bear.

USS Indianapolis

2005-04-27T07:23:00.000-07:00

What's a real man?

It is tiresome to hear the barstool theories about quiche, cowboys and crying. Are you a real man if you wear pink? Do women prefer Metro-sexuals? Our society is preoccupied with the trivial sometimes and that is a byproduct of a safe society. We needn't worry about death each day-- unless of course we are worrying about second-hand smoke or radon poisoning. Where are the real men? They're everywhere, but nowhere can they be found in more abundance than in the multitudes of men who wore a uniform and flew off to a distant land in order to ensure that we could all spend our days obsessing about the trivial.

Last night the Discovery Channel aired a documentary on the search for the USS Indianapolis. The search for the ship came up empty, but the focus of the program did not. Traveling with the searchers on the boat were some of Indy’s survivors. These men, these real men left their families, their country and their lives to fight a war that did not last 9 months, but years. To fight a war without embedded reporters and without Kevlar vests. To fight a war without satellite phones or email. Their memories of the Pacific are not of sunsets on the ocean or palm trees against the sand. Their memories are visions of the faces and smiles of their friends and comrades within a frame of screams, smoke and death. These men who helped steer the ship that carried the bomb that ended World War II and saved the world, have lived 60 years with the memories of what happened as the USS Indianapolis slipped beneath the waves in the Pacific on July 30th, 1945.

The Indianapolis was a Portland class heavy cruiser weighing 9,800 tons and the flagship of the fifth fleet. She had seen a lot of action since her commission in 1932. When peacetime ended and WWII began she began the war on the water with the Japanese. She sunk a Japanese transport off the coast of Alaska in 1943, she took part in the Gilberts, Marshalls, Marianas and Peleliu.

1945 saw victory for the world and tragedy for the Navy. The spring for these men on the Indy did not indicate that the war's end was approaching. The crew took part in Iwo Jima in March of 1945. In that battle, she was struck by a Kamikaze plane. Because of the damage she was sent home for repairs. In late July and after she was repaired, the Indy and her crew set sail on a high speed mission from California to Tinian. Her secret cargo would next be carried by the Anola Gay and change the world forever. She then headed for the Philippines.

Late in the night, the captain of the Indy Charles Butler McVay III retired to bed. It was dark, and he instructed his pilot to take evasive maneuvers as necessary. The sea was calm.

Submarine I-58 was constructed by the Japanese in 1944. In 1945 it was retrofitted to carry the "Kaiten" manned torpedo; perhaps emblematic of the despicable nature of the enemy. It was not this ugly weapon that I-58 would fire on the Indy that night, but the hatred and heartlessness that built it would pull the trigger.

6 torpedoes shot through the sea in a fan pattern towards the Indy. The big cruiser had stopped "zigzagging" as there was no sign of trouble ahead. She was a target and the target was struck. Massive holes were torn under the front turret and in its central keel. Torpedoes struck the weapons cache. Fire spread through the ship, electricity was cut, and communication became impossible. The front of the ship was now blasted open. The captain could not call to the engineers to shut down the engine so the Indianapolis pushed full speed into the water and eventually into a nosedive, 10,000 feet to the ocean floor.

It took 12 minutes.

Death came in an instant and stayed for days. Some men died when the torpedoes hit. Others locked their friends behind bulk heads in hopes to hold back the water and save the ship. The affects of a logical decision does not quiet 60 years of screams.

The majority of those who made it off the ship were not on life boats. Some were dressed and others only wore the attire they took to bed. They floated in the ocean with only a collar life preserver. As the ship went down, her engines were still screaming. The suction of the sinking ship took some of the men down with her; others were diced by the screws as they smashed through the water.

Then silence.

The men swam to each other, beginning the awful investigation of the others floating around them. Those without life had their life jackets removed and were allowed to slide below the surface. It went on for hours. Surely by morning the Navy would come looking.

It would take 4 days. The Navy later convened a court martial. The captain, McVay, survived and was put on trial for allowing evasive maneuvers to be "optional". No discussion of the Navy's negligence and incompetence in ignoring the lost and missing Indianapolis was had until the year 2001. In 2001, McVay's record was expunged of any wrong-doing. In 1946 Admiral Nimitz as Chief of Naval Operations remitted McVay's sentence of demotion and restored him to duty. McVay retired in 1949 as a Rear Admiral. McVay would never see justice brought to him and he never stopped hearing the screams of his men. He shot himself with his service revolver in 1969.

For the men adrift in the ocean, the 4 days were pure hell. Alone and treading water they had to wonder where their countrymen were. By day two they had to have lost all hope. Then the sharks came. The men, huddled together in groups to stay warm and alert would suddenly see the man next to them pulled below. The sharks would feed daily, eating the torso and discarding the limbs; leaving them to float to the surface, back to the others.

Men broke. Some went insane in the water trying to survive and trying to cope.

Finally, a passing aircraft spotted the men and those that remained were pulled out of the water.

Now some of those men returned to the Pacific to look for the old ship lost first on July 30th and then ignored for 4 days more. These men, 60 years older and changed forever looked like any other we may have seen. These are old men, in their 80's. Overweight, smiling, brought to tears at the sight of the water.

There is no controversy of real men or of masculinity in these men's eyes. There is truth, there is honor, there is respect and there is love. They have a love of the present enduring due to an honoring of the past. The men below the surface are no deader to these men on the surface then the rest of the search-boat's crew. These men know that thier life is a gift and a special one. They stand on this boat this day having had 60 years of sunrises and freedom, not because they were lucky and not because they were fortunate. Instead they earned their lives and the men who never made it home from that tour 60 years ago are no less responsible for the lives we live today.

Freedom is not free. Extraordinary people have walked this Earth, but there are no greater than those that give all they have for another. These men are real men, which is to say they are real human beings; filled with all that is and ever will be the best of the human spirit.

A Large Problem

2005-04-26T07:03:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking about exercising more. It wouldn't be difficult to exercise more, because any exercise would be "more" exercise.

This new job I have is making me fatter. The company is smaller, so the distance from the door to the parking lot is much smaller than normal. In fact, I think I walk further to get into my car at my house than at the office. I spend most of my day sitting. When I do have to talk with a user or have a meeting I don't have to go up stairs or across a campus; Usually, I just have to spin my chair in one direction or another. So, either I add an extension to my belt or I need to work out a bit.

Superman never exercised. Ever notice that? Flying was hardly aerobic and even those fight scenes showed little along the lines of a cardio work-out. I guess he had Super metabolism. "Faster than a bullet, able to eat anything and still wear tights". Now, Captain America could stay at the buffet all he wanted because he had that slimming Shield. I don't care how fat you are, if you have a shield nobody will know.

I want to lose weight so that I fit in my t-shirts better. Right now, the front of my t-shirt is starting to form an awning. I was never Tom Cruise, but at least my clothes fit. Now I just pray that I can get through the day without reaching for something high. So I have no choice but to start eating less. Unless, I can find a shield. A really big shield.

Eddy Arnold Never Did This Stuff

2005-04-20T06:13:00.000-07:00

It's no secret that I have a curiously odd obsession with music. I do not like professional musicians of the celebrity sort, I do not care for the obligatory homily on world peace right after the guitar solo or the overly sensitive sequined-soaked wink to the little man. I think following popular music culture is like remedial cultural studies. As with all cultures, there is evidence of all kinds of vice and disorder to study, but the music industry doesn't hide these problems so they are much more easily identifiable.

These people are just damned odd. I was using random on the iPod last night when Motley Crue's remake of "Anarchy in the UK[USA]" came up. The original version was punk crap so I guess the Crue were true to the original when their version reached an all time low in dumb lyrics, bad vocals and almost unintentional fits of amplified racket. Anarchy, in this case, relates to using the f-word 6 times in the lyrics and revolting against commonly understood principles in audio modulation, key and meter.

To be Motley Crue and sing of Anarchy, is a bit of a farce. Reading the lyrics (Sex Pistols originally), there really isn't a clear thought. The intention, I think is more a message of non-conformity than political anarchy. The Crue is far from being independent thinkers. Let's see, in the 80's it was glam-hair rock (like everybody else). In the 90's it was contemplative purposeless darkness (like everybody else). In this decade, it's crude sexual boorishness with a mix of tattooed flesh (like everybody else). These guys are different from you and me, but when it comes to the music industry, they are as unique as a bolt in a hardware store.

My favorite fool is Madonna "The queen of reinvention". "Reinvention" is a term the music industry uses for "Well, that didn't work, try something else". Madonna has built this persona of being unique and trail-blazing, all the while living inside a bubble of standard options for change. If she wanted to be really different, she'd shut up. No, we don't get that, she instead goes for new and different pant fabrics and adds an oboe to the same disco music-bed she puts on most of her songs.

The music industry has built a persona that first appears to be based on talent, second appears to carry cutting-edge importance and last actually seems to be a relevant part of society. Of course, they are none of those things and less. They are well-dressed carnival workers with more pervasive disorders and a history of even worse lifestyle-choices. However, in being those things they do serve a purpose of being a diversion, which I guess was their purpose in the first place.

Walker, Taxes Ranger

2005-04-18T07:49:00.000-07:00

The Walker Art Center re-opened this past weekend in Minneapolis. The Walker has been reborn to an expanded and updated state of being. I haven't been there yet, but I'm assuming that the construction dumpsters didn't include the exhibits. Therefore, its new birth is likely a state of being absurd.

Reading the Star Tribune's story on the opening weekend I found the same old cliche's and stereotypes.

Modern art lovers in the Twin Cities have been holding their breath for more than a year. On Sunday, the first day the newly renovated Walker Art Center was open to the public, they exhaled with delight.

To quote Dom Delloise in "Blazing Saddles": "Sounds like steam escaping." Modern art. The title itself is pretentious. Anything that has gone before is stale, this is modern. A picture of something, please...that is so 2003.

They came by car, by foot, by bicycle and by taxi. They wore high heels and hats, and T-shirts and bluejeans. They were old and young, buttoned up and hip, from across the street and from out of town.

So it was a lot like a normal Sunday at Wal-Mart. There are people who believe that paragraph is actually saying something amazing. For them, it probably is. People don't come by car, foot, bicycle and taxi to coffee houses and holistic grocery stores. Here's the irony, the burbs and the rural areas actually have a convergence of thoughts and ideas and people. The high-brow over-educated uptown urbanites don't mix with the rest of us. So, when they see people different from themselves actually wandering into one of their haunts it becomes noteworthy-- and probably troublesome. I'm sure many in that clique are worried that site may have become too pedestrian. How can you be special if everybody is let in?

TIM LLOP, 11, Minneapolis

Tim Llop edged his way to the front of the crowd clustered in front of the Dolphin Oracle, the animated talking dolphin that answers any question typed on a keyboard.

"Ask what its favorite color is," said Tim's father, Henry Llop. Tim typed in the question. The answer appeared on the screen in subtitles below the oracle, who chattered in dolphinese.

"My favorite color is green, like money," the oracle said.

"Now ask it something of social importance," Henry Llop said.

"Do you like Jimi Hendrix," Tim typed.

"I think Hendrix is cool," the dolphin replied.

Good for you Tim, if your Dad tells you to do something stupid, then do it in a stupid way. Social importance? The kid's 11. Ask him to find out who'll win the golden glove this year or whether Brittney Spears will have twins. Ask him to ask if that girl down the street really IS stuffing her bra. Social importance? Dad, get a grip and another friend. Your son's got better things to do than hang out with your "modern" view.

JEFFREY PETERSEN, 27, and MATTHEW GOODE, 29, Minneapolis

Petersen and Goode walked into the dark video gallery and plunked down together on one of the black beanbag chairs as if it were in their living room.

Mesmerized, they watched all 26 minutes of artist Rinke Dijkstra's video portraits. The videos showed a series of young people dancing, kissing, smoking and chewing gum in front of a white wall. The plaque by the door explained that the Dutch artist had shot the footage at a music club.

When it was over, Petersen and Goode said they had seen the videos "a million times" in the Walker's previous incarnation, and they were delighted to see it again. They are subtle but very moving portraits of young people, Goode said.

"We love it," Petersen said. "The people all look so uncomfortable and shy. The way they avoid eye contact."

The two also said they were happy to be at the new Walker.

"I think it's stunning," Petersen said. "It makes me excited to be from Minneapolis."

So much in that block isn't there. First of all, let's discuss why they love the videos. "The people all look so uncomfortable and shy...". They hate happy people, because happy people are false. It took these films to show people as they are. Grim. Sad, depressed and hopelessly lost. Modern art is the new Kool-Aide. If you're happy, you aren't informed.

Then there's the last line. "It makes me excited to be from Minneapolis". Minneapolis or any town should be about who is there, not what. These people seem to lack confidence, focus and an internal compass. They are nothing without something to point to around them that makes them feel less small. I guess the last sentence proves my point about the films they watched. These two have nothing, apparently, to point to in their location to be proud of other than this. Worldclass hospitals? No no, the poor can't get pills. 3M, Honeywell, Cargill, Bestbuy? No no, just a byproduct of a consumer-driven society. Environment, lakes and beauty? No, no, four-wheelers are taking it all away. No, there's nothing to be proud of other than this thing that tells us that anyone who is proud is not being real; and to be real you better admit your sad.

I have been to the Walker many, many times. I've been to the Minneapolis Institute of Arts many times as well. The latter has a wide range of art on display. Beautiful romantic pieces, gilded pieces from the Baroque period and oddly sophisticated art from our century found nestled in photographs, paintings and kitchen appliances. The Walker has stuffed-shirt finger painting. At the Institute of Art, the work is judged based on what it is. The work at the Walker is judged based on why it is.

Modern as a descriptor isn't at all bad in retrospect. What you see at the Walker probably is what the current state of art is. It also points out the truth in human artistic drive: this and the last century is different than any other. We have space-age materials, wildly complicated machinery and unbelievably uncomplicated technology. Today's art should be different. Unfortunately, the Walker presents art with baggage. Sad people championing being sad. To let happy people in would mean first allowing others in-- so that won't happen anytime soon. The Walker would rather run out of the right kind of artists than change what it views an artist as being. After all, if the world had no artists that would be quite sad and that would be the greatest modern artistic expression of all.

Taxing

2005-04-15T05:45:00.000-07:00

Hey! It's tax day!

All together now....

Shit.

I get my taxes done early-- 1st week of February every year. I like to get it over with and the chances of me holding on to all those documents that come in the mail until April is a task greater than I could bear.

You know what really bugs me about taxes? That we all pay different amounts. Should I wander into Wal-Mart to purchase a stylish set of Dale Earnhardt commemorative BBQ mits I will pay the same price as any other tasteless fool who wishes to do the same. It's not that way with taxes is it? What's worse, is if I pay more than my neighbor it doesn't mean I will get more back. In fact, usually those who pay more taxes get less in the form of services from the government. Self-sufficient people manage their own insurance, their own income, don't get subsidized food and they have to pay for other people to get those same services for "free".

Then there's the whole earned-income tax credit. Only lawyers could come up with this scam. For some reason, my standard deduction appears to be a "subsidy" from the government. So, because I get to deduct a few thousand dollars being a taxpayer, that means that some one who is not a taxpayer should be flat out given a few thousand dollars. So, now those BBQ mits at Wal-Mart are on sale, but if I buy them at a reduced rate I have to give my savings to the 40 year old man riding on the mechanized frog in the entryway-- why? Hell if I know.

My problem is, I can't find a taxing scheme without problems. We all hate this progressive stupidity we have now (unless you work for government I suppose or don't pay in at all). What else do we use?

Flat tax? Here's my problem with that: To pay 12% in for instance, you still have to figure out your income. So we're back to this progressive nonsense where the government will put out 1,500 pages of regulations on what is and is not income. Not to mention that it won't stay at 12% for long. Studies have shown that with each increase in taxes, an equal increase in tax shelters arise. In other words, for every rule the IRS comes up with, somebody out there finds a way to out-smart it. When we go flat, the IRS could leave the rules the same and just increment the percentage. I suppose they could do that now, but this system would make it so much easier.

Then there's a national sales or consumption tax. Again, sounds good on the surface. It's a pay as you go plan. However, let's say you want to stick it to the government. You can't without screwing over the economy. Also, this would not mean the end of social engineering through the tax code. You can bet that yachts, Porches, beer, bibles and cigarettes will be taxed at near 30%. Whereas rainbow bumper stickers, wheat germ, Birckenstocks and Barbara Streisand albums will be exempt.

Necessary evil? I suppose. However, the more money that becomes "necessary", the more "evil" the whole process becomes.

The Most Incredible Story Ever Told

2005-04-12T07:28:00.000-07:00

I watched "The Incredibles" last night and was reminded why I loved this movie when I saw it the first time. It's dazzling. The story is well turned, the characters are just thick enough and the visuals are breathtaking. This movie should have won awards and did manage to win a fair number of them. There was not enough acknowledgment though, from my perspective.

The Incredibles or "Hum Hai Laajawab" as it was known in India captured a theme and then massaged it beautifully for the entire 121 minutes. The scenery is wonderful. "Syndrome's" lair is what a James Bond movie wishes a villians lair could look like. In animation, this stylized neato-world could be tied together down to the last simple detail. Fashionista Edna E' Mode's (voiced by a man, by the way) home is a spectacular picture into futuristic 50's architecture; complete with low-rising building on a hill encircled in glass, sharp right angles and boxy overhangs. The interiors are so interesting, if not impossible in this day and age. Edna's tall curving staircase with the treads independently inserted into a wall on one side and dangling out over the room free on the other, could be constructed with today's materials. Sadly, we'll never have one because the local building inspector would never allow it.

One bit of trivia, at the end of the movie the next great villain appears. "Underminer" blasts to the surface riding within a large iron tunneling machine complete with rusty 100 yard screw-tip.

Behold, the Underminer! I'm always beneath you, but nothing is beneath me! I hereby declare war on peace and happiness! Soon, all will tremble before me!

The Underminer was voiced by John Ratzenburger. Cliff Clavin Jr from Cheers, but more recently "Hamm" from Toy Story, "Yeti" from Monsters Inc. and from the Fish School in Finding Nemo. Pixar is in love with Cliffie it would seem. With the kind of coin these movies bring in, if I were Cliffie I would stay bellied up to that bar for the foreseeable future.

Shrek I never got into. I liked it, it was amusing. However, it was like Madd magazine. Yes, I laughed. However, if I own one I don't know where it is and I wouldn't work too hard to find it. Shrek had its problems, most of the problems were rooted in the musical choices. "A Knight's Tale" with Heath Ledger had a similar problem. A Medieval story with the music of Queen as its score. Why do this? Did they not watch Flash Gordon? Freddie Mercury does not translate to box-office smash. With Shrek the musical choices were bubble-gum and part of the gag. So it was lightweight music that itself served to be a joke. It's hard to find something to hold onto in that mix and I found nothing.

When it comes to movies, I like a complete package. I hate when movies hitch their wagon to the latest teeny-bop star and use that music as the score just to gain a few more butts in the seats. Most movies have the decency to just play the track over the credits. Yet, some are brave enough to risk the whole movie by peppering pop music through-out and Shrek was an example of that. Smashmouth, Joan Jett and more. It just didn't work for me. Now, if you're Clint Eastwood and you have an Oranguntan you can carry a movie with an Eddie Rabbit song sharing the title sequence with you. If you are Mike Meyers, stick with John Williams.

Shrek even let Danny Glover sing a song for goodness sake. Danny, I thought you were too old for that sh*t.

The Incredibles was the complete package. Story, art, music. It was beautiful and will be a classic. The style and the genre make it the comedic equivalent to Hitchcock's North by Northwest. To put it succinctly, years from now people will remember Shrek as a movie they saw. 30 years from now, people will remember The Incredibles as a movie they saw...last month.

Master Blaster

2005-04-11T06:56:00.000-07:00

The Masters concluded as it opened: the heavens opened. This time it would not be rain drops that fell upon the bent grass, but dreams tumbling down the cheeks of the turf-warriors as they trudged away to fight no more this day.

Blah, blah blah. That was the kind of crap we heard all afternoon if you watched the Masters on CBS.

The execution was perfect and he was rewarded with an extra revolution

So said the announcer as Tiger Woods' chip fell into the hole like a blind person into a pot-hole. The entire broadcasting team was talking like this, which leads me to believe that they were being fed lines through their headphones. Doubtless somewhere on the Augusta grounds was a trailer filled with freshman English students who were high-fiving one another after finding a way to use the word "zaftig" to describe how Phil Mickelson looked in his outfit.

Combine all the flowery talk with the music bed provided by the wandering melodies of a rest-home piano and I came to one very simple conclusion: They are trying way too hard to make this special.

The Masters is special, but I don't think CBS knows why. Those watching the telecast did not care what any of the fools on mic said. They didn't care about the sepia-tone images of the azaleas bumping in and out of SBC propaganda. They watched the golf you morons.

If there is one thing that embarrasses me, it is trying too hard when I write. Reading things I wrote a week prior and finding that I strained my back coming up with a title or pun is just devastating. This telecast was so obviously contrived. It was so deeply full of itself. It was ridiculously cluttered with metaphor's and romantic soliloquies. It was a first date for cripes sake.

On a side note, the IBM King Arthur commercials have to go. Ok, I get it. Round table/Board table. King/CEO. Ok, ok, let the simile go. Taken to its full extent King Arthur will pull Excalibur from a stone while his alter-ego CEO will pull the EBITDA numbers out of his a*s.

Hey, IBM consulting. Want a job? Consult with your other division and tell them to build a laptop that doesn't need rebooting every 7 seconds. Or, to put it so you'll understand. Tell King Arthur that the word is Lancelot has been trying to interface with Guinevere, but in doing so the kingdom crashes and has to be restarted.

Bad Tune Rising

2005-04-09T11:10:00.000-07:00

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone

Wow, that's a day-lifter. I was thinking about this Red Lake shooting again and why these little morons seem to think riddling their classmates with bullets is a good idea. I've come to the conclusion that the quality of dancing at the high school is partly to blame. Not dancing exactly, but the dance itself. The lyric above is from Green Day's "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" and it's riding atop the charts this week. Sure it's a depressing song, but that in itself is no reason to kill people, Green Day maybe, but not your classmates. No the root of it all is that cheerleaders do not look good dancing to this crap.

Now, take this from David Lee Roth's "Yankee Rose"

She's a vision form coast to coast (Coast to coast)
Sea to shining sea (Sea to shining sea)
Hey, sister you're the perfect host (Make a toast)
Show me your bright lights - And your - City lights - All right
I'm talkin' about the Yankee Rose
Bright lights - And your - City lights - All right!

It's simple, it's fast, it's upbeat and it doesn't mean a damn thing. It's perfect. This is the kind of mindless nonsense cheerleaders should be dancing too at high school dances. Boys do not put on trench coats and kill people when given this sort of outlet.

Don't it make your brown eyes blue.

2005-04-08T11:48:00.000-07:00

WEST FARGO, N.D. - A West Fargo woman has been charged with shoplifting two puppies from a Moorhead, Minn., pet store.

Authorities said Sheila Marie Hoffart, 19, took the dogs home and dyed one of them purple and the other one blue. - AP

When you have the Easter spirit, I guess there's nothing you won't do. I stop at eggs, but apparently others have found other ways to express themselves.

Moorhead police said she admitted taking the Shih Tzu and sheltie puppies.

Police said she stole the dogs on two different occasions in January and February, putting the puppies in her backpack and leaving without paying.

Hoffart told police she took the dogs because she felt sorry for them. She used nontoxic hair dye to color the dogs' fur because she wanted to make them more unique, police said. - AP

She's got a point. If you've seen one Sheltie, you've seen them all. Take a Shih Tzu, for instance. Now say that again fast without giggling. Dogs have their own personalities, but they are really all about the same within breed.

You don't see a lot of dog customizations. There are sweaters and collars and other accessories, but there really isn't an outlet for after-market upgrades. Maybe this girl is onto something. I wonder if you would get in trouble from the animal cops if you dyed your dog? In this case the dogs were stolen, but what if they were your own? I see toddlers with bad dye jobs all the time. Why not be able to dye your pet?

I'm kidding of course. Anyone who would dye a dog's fur has some sort of disorder. I'm not sure clinically what it is, but whatever it is should cause owner to be spayed or neutered.

Case in point: Exhibit A (pictures included)

Ferrari's in trouble and God takes the Pole

2005-04-04T06:24:00.000-07:00

The Pope is dead and Ferrari's F2005 sucks. Italy's having a bad weekend.

Renault is ruling the F1 world. Alonso won in Malaysia and yesterday's run in Bahrain. Alonso didn't just win in Bahrain, he had a 12 second lead at the end. 2005 will be an interesting year.

I'm not catholic, so I don't get the pope thing. I understand his importance and his impacts. I understand the vatican's work to end communism, save and secure treasures from the Nazis, etc. I do not understand the "holy father" thing. Lutherans don't pray to Luther, let alone a high ranking member of the church. In fact, if a high ranking member of the synod comes to our church to speak, there's a good chance the congregation will groan because it means the service will be extended. When a speaker comes to church, the service is usually abbreviated to make space for a speech and keep the time in total down to 60 minutes. The congregation is given false hope as they realize that there's 15 minutes until the top of the hour and only 5 minutes of liturgy left.

"NO! I think we're going to end early...unless...who's the guy in the suit? Oh man, we have to hear about the synod's efforts to teach urban Detroit youth how to play tetherball. Nuts."

Yesterday, the Pope was on display. For the first time in 30 years he was not encased in bullet-proof glass. He was not in a casket. He was just laying there on a buffet table. His head was propped up 18" or so using pillows. He wore a crimson and white set of robes and a dapper set of slippers. Of course, he was also wearing that hat that looks like the Coors symbol.

I understand that a lot of people love the Pope and that the pope did great things. However, not being catholic I don't understand why people now pray TO him. So, there's God who is three parts (Father, Son, Holy Spirit). I've got that part. Then the catholics put a whole bunch more characters up there to keep track of. Of course, there's Mary. I do get that part. However, you also have the list of Saints and Popes to complicate things.

It was interesting when they had utilitarian saints for luck, wealth, hygiene, etc. That was always sort of a novelty. What does praying to the pope do? Does he then go and talk to God for you? Are you not able to talk to God if your catholic? Why? Is it because you're not worthy? If that's what Catholics think I think they should stop focusing on the holy father and go back to studying the work of the Son.

To tie this together, the beloved Ferrari's are sitting 6th and 13th (last) in F1 points. However, two Italians are in the top 3 (Trulli in 2nd, Fisichella in 3rd). As for the pope, there are no Poles in the competition. Perhaps JP II missed his calling and could've held back this surge by Renault. The pope did help defeat communism and make inroads to Cuba, that's more than the French ever did.

Stupid Sql Server

2005-04-01T07:12:00.000-08:00

SQLServer makes me angry.

Do you think this piece of crap could have decent documentation? Do you think this piece of crap could have one stitch of informative information CONSISTENTLY available? Microsoft should be able to support its users with detailed information, however the open source world has far better avenues for information. Oracle-- not exactly a small company, but it is aligned with the open-source world due to its involvement in J2. Oracle has far more information available on the web and from 3rd parties. Microsoft's SQL server is documented in a labyrinth of silly tutorials and half-answered questions. Yes, I'm sure I just didn't look in the right place-- but that's part of my point. It's easy to find the right place with other tools.

Same goes for Apple. Twice now, once with my AirportExpress and with my iPod, did I have to resort to hack-websites to get access to normal diagnostic functions. In the case of the AirportExpress, there were undocumented features in the configuration setup. This I don't understand: if someone is actually opening up and configuring the unit, they are not a simple user. So write the documentation to support a power user, don't dumb it down and leave out have the settings so as not to confuse.

Today's SqlServer problem was insanely stupid. The transaction logs filled up. So I started searching for the best way to trim them and truncate them. This turned into a 90 minute trek through a 100 websites (including Microsoft of course) each with different and conflicting instructions/opinions. Most ended with this: "Once you've gotten a good back-up it is safe to truncate the log". Gee thanks, how the hell do you do that? Thankfully, I have friends who've suffered the same pain and could help me dig through the nonsense and get the files deflated. My issue was that the log had been shrunk down to 20 meg, but it was still consuming 5 gig of space. Changed a couple settings (compress pages and move to the front, clear unused freespace from the end of the file), the shrink operation took care of the issue. I never found this information in the documentation.

Microsoft is starting to annoy me again. Microsoft is a lot like a stripper, I think. They look so good and just like what you think you want. Then, you realize you've ran out of money, your marriage is ruined after spending the weekend with them, they never are as good as the demo and you're sure to get a virus if you use them.

I pod, therefore I am broke

2005-03-30T14:17:00.000-08:00

I spoke to a "genius" at the Apple store about my afore mentioned folder icon problem. End result is that my pod is dead. The hard drive has stopped spinning. The unit is broken and can't be mended by being put into a pod-cast (boo, hiss).

Nifty little process they have at the Apple store. You walk in and find any computer, click on Genius Bar, fill out a little form on a web browser and viola! you are registered for service. Nifty, but far more complicated than take-a-number. I did like being called by name instead of a number however.

The particular store to which I went was fresh out of 40 gig pods so I have to wait until a new shipment comes in. Hopefully, it will be here in another day or so. The days are interminably quiet without my music and once you have all of your music with you wherever you go you just can't be satisfied with the radio.

The radio will always have a place, but it has become the Reader's Digest for audiophiles. New music is not discovered on the radio, it is merely displayed in condensed versions. The radio has been reduced to what you listen to in the bathroom or when your iPod is broken. Unless it is talk radio which is an entirely different discussion.

I guess, radio has been reborn or sent back to the past to restart. The early days of radio found it as an entertaining and informative medium for the spoken word. Non-stop music as a foundation was not the staple of old. In the golden age of radio AM was king and FM was an outlier. Now, AM radio is becoming the more frequently used device for the repeating-radio listener and FM is once again a secondary option; partly because musical choice far exceeds that supplied by the modern FM station, but also because talk radio has grown to a popularity that has started to chip away at the hold crystal-clear FM frequencies cherish.

While at the Apple store I ran into James Lileks -- a real treat for me as I have been a fan for many, many years. We had a nice 20 minute conversation about this and that. Not sure if he'll remember me, as is often the case it is difficult to be witty and engaging on cue or as was the case "on queue". I was struck by how normal and at ease with talking to a stranger he was. Granted, the guy is not a major celebrity, but then again this was a Tuesday night and he was out running errands. I get annoyed when some one I know stops to chit-chat, imagine what it must be like to be stopped by some one you don't know and half the time wants to impress you with big words? I resisted the temptation to impress as I probably would have failed. Instead we just shot the bull and it made for a nice moment in time. Next time I'll be dynamic.

I was reminded of the time that I met Norm Coleman, the senator, at a play in downtown Minneapolis. I shook his hand and said "keep at it, don't back down". It's all I could think of at the moment and I realized later that I wasn't all that clear. I hoped he thought I was referring to his political positioning, but I suppose he could've construed that I was talking about a bladder control problem for all I know.

Java

2005-03-30T06:13:00.000-08:00

Caribou in the morning. I prefer Starbuck's (the coffee is sweeter), but there's a Caribou right on my way to work and nary a Starbuck's within 20 miles. I don't think you should mix your coffee vendors anyway. Venti/Large, dark/house; it is all very confusing.

Frankly, my favorite chain for coffee is Dunn Brothers. I have a friend who manages a couple and even without that connection I would find them more comfortable. Caribou always feels like the Burger King to Starbuck's Mcdonalds. Whereas Dunn Brothers is more like a RAX.

I have noticed that getting coffee before 7 am is a lot different than after 9 am. The crowds and requests are decidedly different. At 6:30 am, it's coffee. That's it. Before 7 the coffee shop is Martini's bar in "It's a Wonderful Life" during the illusion sequence: it's a place where men want to go to get jittery fast.

Arrive at 9am and the crowd is totally different. Women in business suits and Reeboks, men who look they fell out of an L.L. Bean catalog. At 7 you see newspapers. At 9 you see laptops. At 9 people don't seem to order coffee, instead they order experiments. What would happen if we mixed an ounce of coffee with half&half, mocha, peppermint, banana, orange peels, flouride, nutmeg, kibble and topped it off with a grape? Answer: somebody will pay 6 bucks for it-- after 9.

Sunday morning sidewalks

2005-03-28T06:13:00.000-08:00

I rolled out of bed for Easter church at 4:30 AM Sunday. Singing in the choir has its benefits, not having to watch the toddlers when having to sing is certainly one. Easter morning could be considered a drawback though. 3 services with the first starting at 6 AM and then an 8 and 10:30 service.

Waking up early is rough, but it's the waiting that gets to you. The first two services are only separated by an hour, but that last 90 minute break is just brutal.

It was a beautiful day. I used my 90 minute break to open the sunroof and drive up to Lake Harriet. It was 50 degrees and that temperature in a Minnesota spring is not a temperature, it's an overture. Combined with a blue-bird sky and a bright, warm sun it was a glorious Easter morning. I idled up and down several streets surrounding the lake and I wondered why I don't go there more often. I couldn't live there. I'd like to think I could because the houses are wonderfully quaint and the towering trees lining the streets are majestic. However, if you place a hose reel in your yard you would cover half your lawn. And those wonderful tree-line streets are also lined with cars. Cars on the street in Minnesota makes me think "snow emergency" and I shudder at the thought of crawling out of bed and moving my car across, down or to another street. Not for me.

It is nice though, except the people. I didn't get out of my car, but the people for the most part are so... downtownish. Riding their bikes down the middle of the street instead of 15 feet to the left on the bike path or power-walking in spandex while carrying and sipping from a steaming Starbucks cup. They're probably not bad people and likely are very good friends to others. However, they are so different from me that I don't think we could ever be friends. I could be wrong, but I'm usually fairly good at figuring out who to waste my time on.

Here today. Fore tomorrow

2005-03-25T05:59:00.000-08:00

I'm going to start playing golf again this year. I've been on a 4 year hiatus from the game. I quit because of 2 reasons:

I was getting sick of calling on Monday to be able to play on Saturday
I got hit into 3 times in one year

Golf has not reduced in popularity, but I hope the talent has improved. Granted, I suck. Verily I say that thee sucketh greatly. I played for nearly 20 years before I gave it up and while I never really got all that good at the game, I at least had depth perception. So, when the great masses of baffoons in untied Wal-Mart hi-tops, wigger shorts and wife-beater t-shirts waddled onto the course and rocketed their orange x-outs at me I was a bit put off.

And a 70 dollar green fee for the bride and myself was no joy either.

The real reason to return is that I've got the itch. No, not more health problems. In this case for the first time in years I am every day thinking about swinging a golf club. That hasn't happened in a while.

They say that an amputee feels pain in the leg or arm that's no longer there. Memory pain. Every late August, 14 years after I left high school I still get that feeling that I should be getting fitted for shoulder pads and buying new football spikes. Once it becomes part of you, it's hard to shake it. It used to be like that with the first 50 degree days of April and the golf course for me. Recent years I've not felt the itch at all. This year it's back and I guess I'll have to see whether I have the time, patience and funds to scratch it.

Step 1: I think I need new clubs. Of course, that's always step 1.

Last tooth story.

2005-03-24T14:56:00.000-08:00

My teeth are better. Had the root canal and it went well. I like my Dentist. He's a DDS which I always understood, but now they are also FAGP's. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

I have to go back to the dentist to finish this process. The root canal is basically a process in which the dentist numbs your jaw and then crawls into your mouth, sits down on a metal chair and then calmly attends to your tooth with a razor, hammer, sawzall and .38 revolver. At least that's what it felt like to me. How the man manages to stick both hands wrist deep in my mouth and still see is a tribute to his skill or my gaping maw. Probably both. The end result of the canal is that I no longer have pain, but I do have one tooth that feels as though it was chopped half off at the top and then coated with that gelatinous substance that forms at the end of a drumstick. Next week I go back and they see if my tooth is all healed or if they need to go back in and shoot me.

Then a couple weeks later I get a crown. No, not homecoming king. This time the coronation will be more subdued-- although probably still involving about the same level of narcotics. All in all this process is basically varying levels of pain mixed with uncomfortable probing and several articles in People magazine. It's a behind-the-music episode essentially.

By the way, People magazine is the worst magazine ever. My observation to the Dentist was that People is like some one took those idea-books at the hair salon and had Larry King write captions for the pictures. "HIGHLIGHTS: I say YES!"

I, Podious

2005-03-24T07:28:00.000-08:00

Stupid iPod.

I love my pod, I really do. It now irritates me. I have spent a week attempting to get rid of the folder icon and still it mocks me. I've reset it, restored it, switched it to disk mode, ran the apple re-format. I've done it all.

I was about to take it into the apple store for service when as I put it in the box it turned on. No sound of disk thrash, no herky-jerky response. I hooked to the firewire port on the computer-- it showed up in iTunes! I ran the updater on it and re-restored it. All Good!

So I began the arduous process of re-syncing and downloading the 12 gig of mp3's to my newly fixed pod only to have it blue-screen my pc after a 1,000 songs. And now we are back to the folder icon and the disk thrash.

I guess I'm off to Apple. Why can't they make a 40 gig hard drive the size of an oreo less complicated?

Root of all....

2005-03-23T06:55:00.000-08:00

Root canal today.

Do people die at the dentist? I don't recall ever hearing of a case where somebody up and died in the chair.

If you do die at the dentist, the government should require that you be entombed with that little bib on as a sign. How many times have you heard that some great Egyptian pharaoh died from most likely a "tooth ache"? Well, if they'd have bricked him into the stone teepee with a bib on we would know for sure.

If I die today because the hygenists trips and stabs me through the heart with the metal hook, please bury me with the bib on.

On a side note, can they not find a better way to x-ray your teeth than making you stick that razor blade in your mouth and bite? If we can put a man on the moon we shouldn't have to make him suck on car key when he needs a Polaroid of his roots. My opinion.

Careful what you wish for

2005-03-22T05:51:00.000-08:00

I hated school. Didn't like going, staying or anything that went on while I was inside. Strangely enough, I never shot anybody.

I had plenty of reasons. Just no bullets. If I would have had the bullets, doubtless I would have missed anything I tried to shoot. I just never lived up to any of my potential in school-- ask my mom.

After Columbine and now this new shoot-em-up in Red Lake, the prevailing question seems to be "what's happening to our children". Sorry, 20 years ago I was close to snapping. So was everybody I knew. Even the guys landing the cheerleaders were two zits away from ramming their Cutlass through the library window. The difference now is that these kids are finally practicing what parents and guidance counselors have been preeching; apply yourself and you can do whatever you want.

We, in my generation, were just as violent, we were just lazy and lacked a positive attitude. If we would have felt better about ourselves, we certainly could have been depressed enough to kill 2/3 of our class.

Agony of D'teeth

2005-03-18T06:04:00.000-08:00

I am fighting a toothache. Not really a toothache so much as a tooth war. For nearly a week now, it feels as though a porcupine has been doing situps on my gums.

The dentist is a good man and I pity him. The full breadth of a dentist's repertoire involve metal hooks, needles, pliers and pills. At this point, I'm on the pills, but I know that in a few days the rest of his wares will be put to use. It must be awful to know that as a healer he has to first put me through an overature of pain to localize the infection and then rectify the infection with grand finale of more pain. He must be a quietly guilty man or has a soft spot for abuse. I'm banking on the former.

The upside to pills is that they exist, the downside is that they wear off. In between the ups and downs are the dreams. Last night I had a narcotic-induced vision of Jennifer Garner. Now, you might say that has potential, but in this case she was the keynote speaker at a bull castration seminar that I was attending. I do not know why she was a castration specialist in my mind, but the graphic nature of the demonstration illustrated her skill. Perhaps it is a cruel trick that God is playing on the devil while my mind is incopacitated. The devil implants Jennifer Garner, public place and testicles in my head and God presents them back to me in a dream; the devil cast off once more to become more precise.

I tried to work from home yesterday. I hate working from home. I lasted 40 minutes before driving into the office. It's just not comfortable because it is comfortable. Working on my laptop in my recliner is too comfortable for work. Work needs to be work. With pills in one hand and the other affixed permanently to the side of my face, I've put in full days of work each day of this infliction. Until the doc says its time to go in with a hammer and play wack-a-mole on my jaw, I'll keep gutting it out.

No sympathy please, it's a toothache, not a twist of fate. Feel around in your mouth. Any teeth left in there? If you answered yes, your time for castration dreams is coming.

Suspended Reality

2005-03-16T12:31:00.000-08:00

Larry Carter, crew chief for the No. 2 Dodge driven by Rusty Wallace, was fined $1,000. During opening-day inspection, the car's shoulder harness did not have a date tag displayed, a violation of Sections 17.2-C and 12-4-A.
-Nascar.com

Could we be a bit more ridiculous? Next they'll start fining people for proper use of grammar in Nextel Cup.

3 crew chiefs for the Nextel Cup have been suspended. Alan Gustafson (Hendrick 5) and Chad Knaus (Hendrick 48) are out for 2 weeks. Todd Berrier (RCR 29) is out for 4 weeks. Berrier is perhaps the obvious choice for benchtime as he tampered with the fuel-cell in order to get an unfair advantage (he made the cell look full even though it only had 4 gallons on board-- shifting the weight to the front of the car for better turning).

NASCAR and its rules. They've got so many rules and regulations that these races are more of a literacy test than anything else. Just wait until they find traction control on somebody's car. When that happens the crew chief, car owner, driver, pit team and their families will be damned from the sport forever.

Why do we even have race shops anymore? The Chevy's, Fords and Dodge's are all exactly the same except in driver seat, engine block and front nose. By the end of the year when the "Car of the Future" is released the cars will be even less different. So why doesn't NASCAR just deliver the cars to the teams on Wednesday like they do the tires? Here you go Chad, Alan, Todd-- here's your car for the week and it's exactly the same as everybody else's right down to the number of rivets. You guys drop an engine in it, fit your driver seat and affix all your decals. We'll see you Friday for qualifying.

F1: Renault 1 and 3 down under

2005-03-15T06:54:00.000-08:00

Giancarlo Fisichella and Fernando Alonso finished 1st and 3rd respectively in the Australian Grand Prix in Melbourne over the weekend. Ferrari managed a 2nd place finish thanks to Rubens Barrichello. The seemingly indestructible Michael Schumacher ended his day on lap 43 when his Ferrari tangled with the Williams-BMW of Nick Heidfelt.

I saw glimmers of hope for the '05 season throughout the field. Though Kimi Raikkonen finished at the end of the points in 8th, he did managed to do that having had to be pushed into the pits from the start finish line. The hapless David Coulthard took the new Red Bull Racing team into 4th and Mark Webber finished in the points at 5th showing what is hopefully a resurgence in Williams chassis and BMW power.

The real question though will be asked all this and next week and answered in Malaysia. This year the FIA has mandated the 2 race minimum on engines. So for the first time there will be a true test of engineering and engine design. Though they have an option to stagger the engines, the constructors are only allowed to use 1 of their engines less than 2 times for the extent of the 19 race year. Well, with some exceptions.

Most notably, there is an opportunity to bend the rules and more than likely as the points race escalates some will look to make the best of a bad situation towards the end of the year. The FIA allows teams to a retire an engine if the car entered is retired. In this case, a team who looks to be finishing out of the points could drive to the pits with 10 laps to go and retire a perfectly good car. Doing so would get them a new engine in the next or subsequent weeks. Surely, this loophole will be closed at some point, yet one or more teams will benefit before it is closed. So timing will be everything.

BAR (now Lucky Strike BAR for 2005) blew holes in a large number of Honda blocks last year. Mercedes too could not maintain a level of consistency in 2004. And what of Ferrari? They are the most funded and most complex of all the teams. Will they be able to build a motor that turns 19,000 rpms and lasts 4 practice sessions, 2 qualifing laps and for nearly 200 laps at race speed?

Malaysia will provide the first answers.

Eclipsed by the Sun

2005-03-14T06:15:00.000-08:00

Sun has released a Beta for NetBeans 4.1. Besides full support of J2EE 1.4, it also has better web services integration. 4.1 adds visual editing of containor managed persistence for entity beans and the ability to import BluePrints modules developed in other IDEs. However, the real reason for this release is that for the first time an Eclipse is more recognized than the Sun itself.

The Eclipse project's Eclipse IDE has grown to the point where it has actually caused Sun to take a reactionary stance. This is another example of where a niche success will wedge even the smallest of products into a permanent place in the market.

Eclipse, unlike NetBeans, is not purely tied to J2EE. While Eclipse is tailored toward the Java and open source environment, the plugin-based nature of the tool allows its capabilities to be limited to that of the available components. Components exist for Cold Fusion, source control analysis, database modeling, SQL editing, UML, XML, Graphics and many more. Eclipse is by definition extensible which is why so many have chosen it.

Neither NetBeans nor Excipse or BEA's WorkShop can compare to the robustness and simplicity of Visual Studio. However, the stateof IDE refinement and usefulness continues to improve to the point where they have become a part of the application themselves. Development, compilation, testing, packaging and deployment can now all be handled quite simply through the IDE.

For now, Eclipse and NetBeans are duking it out, this might leave room for the next big star to step forward.

Got their poor poor man

2005-03-12T11:49:00.000-08:00

Well, they caught Nichols at some apartment house. The media is really trying to make this into a drama. They just love the idea of building up this Nichols character into a nuanced individual.

Countless times the news channels have been asking "what made him snap". For goodness sake, what made him snap? Re-write the question to include all the facts. What made the accused rapist snap? That actually seems downright silly now. What made the lunatic snap? It's getting redundant.

They also continue to say that he "surrendered". Um, no. He shot killed 3 maybe 4 people. Wounded others and ran for 26 hours. When he was cornered and surrounded by a swat team-- he decided not to get killed. He was "caught", he did not give himself up.

Why are they so obsessed with making monsters human? There was a human interest story on Nichols. His mother is traveling in Africa and she may come home next week. His father's location is not known. OK, so it sounds like his home life is messed up, again big surprise and who cares. Again though, they interview his old neighbors from when he was growing up and quote them with statements like "he was a good kid" and "we're not sure what happened". For goodness sakes, even if he didn't comit the crimes for which he was being tried, he just killed 4 people running away. He is not a good person no matter how your memories tell you different.

Shooting

2005-03-12T06:26:00.000-08:00

I just read a few stories on this Atlanta Shooting. This quote was the final sentence in a story on CNN.com:

A juror in Nichols' trial told CNN that Barnes was kind, and said Nichols always seemed to be respectful to him.

Right up to the point where he shot 'em to save his own tail. Yes, I'm sure that Nichols, who is guilty at least of this crime if not the rape and false-imprisonment that he was being retried for, would naturally be filled with respect for such a fatherly figure.

Confusing the fear of prison with respect is a bad sign for a jury. Perhaps these people or at least this juror should be pulled from all future jury roles just to be safe.

Please.

Comments

2005-03-11T11:18:00.000-08:00

I sent a note to support indicating that the comments pages were erroring out for people. They have acknowledged the erorr and are working on fixing it.

Stupid computers.

97 Reasons to Cheer for Jeff Gordon

2005-03-11T08:56:00.000-08:00

Roush racing has won 5 of the last 7 races at Las Vegas Motor Speedway. There are 4 drivers from Jack Roush teams in the Nextel Cup top 5. Kurt-weenie-Busch is the points leader.

Busch in the 97 for Roush racing is coming off a championship season and having a very strong year. Matt Kenseth in the #17 is not having a great start, but has won the LVMS race for Roush the last 2 years. While I can stomach seeing the #17 roll into victory lane, nothing will make me watch VIP re-runs faster than if the 97 moves out to a 3 second lead on the field with 50 to go.

Kurt Busch is the annoying little brother of racing. You just want to give him a quarter to go away. And you just know he's a jerk. He got in a fist fight with Jimmy Spencer (well, his face got in the way of Jimmy's fist) two years ago. In that instance, I think it was the battle of Nextel's least interesting characters. Spencer, now in his last good chance before settling into field-filler land and Busch an annoying little fly that you'd like to brush off your TV screen. Through all that nonsense, you had to realize that Jimmy was a big dope that doesn't know any better. You also had to realize that Busch was a little dork that was asking to get his butt whipped. Problem is, in this multi-million dollar business that is the Nextel cup only a dope would get in a fight with the guy (see prior sentence on Spencer).

All I can say is that all those "anybody but Gordon" bumper stickers may soon fall victim of a razor blade. I've yet to see a "97" sticker in a pickup truck window or any buxom gals on TV sporting "Rubbermade" written in glitter letters across their chest. Go ahead keep winning Kurt, you're making Jeff Gordon a star again.

Micro$oft

2005-03-11T06:14:00.000-08:00

Hey, Bill Gates still riding high on top of Forbes list. 46.5 billion net worth which is down from last years 46.6 billion. Poor guy, taking a pay cut like that-- probably got the news at Christmas too.

I'm a Java guy and a Microsoft guy. I'm even slowly becoming a Mac guy. Maybe I'm the exception, but I've never really been able to buy into the whole evil empire deal. Even when the government was telling us that Gates and Microsoft were the great Satan I found it hard to get all that worked up about it. Netscape, sorry, was not a good browser. It was quirky, seemed to have caching problems and was under supported. On the other hand, IE was no prize either (is it yet?). IE 5.01 sp1 was an ugly bit of bug-ridden history.

Where are we now after all the Microsoft brouhaha seems to have subsided? Firefox is growing in popularity, J2EE is now at par with .NET, Macintosh now has a unix backbone and iTunes is all over the PC. Microsoft still has the majority of the market locked up, yet I don't know that it has stopped innovation-- at least not so much as it would be apparent or obvious. You just can't know what would have happened had Microsoft been broken apart.

Although, had it been broken apart, maybe they wouldn't be as defect ridden as they seem to be these days. Maybe their time to market on the next OS and browser would actually be quicker. Hard to say. Microsoft grew to the size it is within its current structure, so you can't say that it doesn't have a good track record for performance. Yet, you have to wonder that if Microsoft had been broken into baby-bytes ala Ma Bell- would it still be a contender? Would Firefox even matter?

Ironically Not a Redskin

2005-03-10T20:25:00.000-08:00

So, Mike Tice now admits he scalped or at least sold his Superbowl tickets this year. Tice in an interview in SI.com says he told the NFL and Red McColmbs that he sold the tickets. Looks to me like he's going to go for the old "Everybody else is doing it" defense. Although, there was this from the AP story:

"I probably shouldn't have sold my tickets,'' Tice told SI.com in a report posted on the Web site Thursday night. "I made a mistake. I regret it. I'll never do it again. I'm going to be in trouble. I'll probably get slapped with a big fine.''

Oh, ok. I see we are trying to telegraph a play. Gee whiz guys I hope you don't fine me and make me have to run laps. Uh huh, I see the obvious play calling on the field translates to his legal affairs.

Good luck, Mike.

Welcome

2005-03-10T13:35:00.000-08:00

Cripes. You'd think this Internet thing would go away sooner or later wouldn't you? I mean it seems like just yesterday we were all looking for our best thin tie to wear to the Eddie Money concert. Here we are in 2005 streaming music, video and anything else that doesn't get you arrested or damned across the web.

I love this thing. I find everything on the web, except free time of course. If the computer was the tool that forever changed the skill-level required to look busy while working, than the Internet has made looking busy a skill right up there with growing nose hair.

"Research", that's what I'm doing. Sure, I'm supposed to be creating a web service, but a guy needs to Google the name of that Rolling Stones Album with the zipper on the cover (yes, Sticky Fingers I know) or find out who that chick with the teeth was in the movie last night. Google, IMDB, The Onion. Whatever. Then of course there is actual work. DotNetRocks, Java Almanac, blah blah.

Let's not forget stereo shopping. Car shopping. Motorcycle shopping. Laser shopping. Oh, I'm not buying a laser, but the point is with the Internet I can actually shop for one.

Anyway, welcome to Geek Speak. I vomit words about tech, family, stereos, corporate America, politics, life. Oh, and don't forget cars and racing. At heart though, I'm a geek. So yes, as I write this I do have code compiling in the background and yes I do have a punchdown panel in my house. But hey, doesn't everybody?